beatle_bailey
Confident
the other day I had watched somthing that triggered my stress
level over a lot of years with out this gorum I have fumbled my way thru this sh-- and partly healed . I still often get triggered , it my be a movie ,, its may be somones story on this site ,,,, the one thing I have learned is they are my real feelings ,, every stinking one of them ,,, but they are real today ,, they are not dyluted by antidepressents or other drugs any more ,,, One way or another I knew I had to feeling every one of all the things I had supressed over all the years of my drinking and druging ,,,, many people may not agree with this method ,, I don't blame you ,,, it was horrific to go thru that way ,,, but it was the only way I could figure at the time ,,,, this forum was not avalable 16yrs ago
I have bin asking how to open a closed heart ,,, how to let people in ,,, and other questions as such in hear and have not gotten much replies ,,, I have gotten some ,, and for those I am thankful for ,,,
but I keep searching and I will not be denide what I need ,,, so I ask many dierant sorces that are avalable to me ,,, I had to painfully search out each one of them ,,,, this is a good place ,,, don't get me wrong '''
I was reading a few of these story ,,, cause I read slow and type even slower ,,, but these storyies have open my heart dramaticly ,,,
and I found my heart opening up to others ,,, found my self crying over other peoples pain and struggles to combat this afull desseaze ,,
I will post a diary soon with Anthony's or somone elses permission
just have a real hard time letting people know the real me ,, that old trust
issue ,,, but still I have seen much growth in other and should try it weather or not I like the Idea or not ,,, cause I ussually find I get much growth in doing things I don't like ,,, so wether or not you have had to do what i have done to get were I am in stage of my recover from Ptsd I do still need lots of inpot ,,, to help me grow further with my sharted heart and the triggers that still hount me ,,, BeatleBailey
ps will some one show me how to start a diary
level over a lot of years with out this gorum I have fumbled my way thru this sh-- and partly healed . I still often get triggered , it my be a movie ,, its may be somones story on this site ,,,, the one thing I have learned is they are my real feelings ,, every stinking one of them ,,, but they are real today ,, they are not dyluted by antidepressents or other drugs any more ,,, One way or another I knew I had to feeling every one of all the things I had supressed over all the years of my drinking and druging ,,,, many people may not agree with this method ,, I don't blame you ,,, it was horrific to go thru that way ,,, but it was the only way I could figure at the time ,,,, this forum was not avalable 16yrs ago
I have bin asking how to open a closed heart ,,, how to let people in ,,, and other questions as such in hear and have not gotten much replies ,,, I have gotten some ,, and for those I am thankful for ,,,
but I keep searching and I will not be denide what I need ,,, so I ask many dierant sorces that are avalable to me ,,, I had to painfully search out each one of them ,,,, this is a good place ,,, don't get me wrong '''
I was reading a few of these story ,,, cause I read slow and type even slower ,,, but these storyies have open my heart dramaticly ,,,
and I found my heart opening up to others ,,, found my self crying over other peoples pain and struggles to combat this afull desseaze ,,
I will post a diary soon with Anthony's or somone elses permission
just have a real hard time letting people know the real me ,, that old trust
issue ,,, but still I have seen much growth in other and should try it weather or not I like the Idea or not ,,, cause I ussually find I get much growth in doing things I don't like ,,, so wether or not you have had to do what i have done to get were I am in stage of my recover from Ptsd I do still need lots of inpot ,,, to help me grow further with my sharted heart and the triggers that still hount me ,,, BeatleBailey
ps will some one show me how to start a diary