Of course there are some things that I could do without:
The depression, the panic attacks, the inability to maintain relationships. But my trias and tribulations have also give me a lot. On a deep and profound level I don't want to be like "them". I don't want to act like them. I don't want to behave like them. Much - most of the abuse I suffered was in broad daylight and even the police were complicant. I don't want my life and the suffering I was subjected to to be for nothing. I am strong - I litterally would not have survived if I were not. I want to make a difference. I want to do so much good with my life that the evil that I was subjected to is reduced. I don't want to be normal. It is the normal people that allowed the hollocaust and they are also the one that watched 500,000 hands chopped off on their ****ing TVs in Rawanda.
I know that I am not supposed to write about sucide but I couln't live with myself if I had to just give up go over to their side. It is the HATE I have for their apathy that keeps me alive.
I have some good poetry on this and related subjects. Is this an appropriate place to post it?
The depression, the panic attacks, the inability to maintain relationships. But my trias and tribulations have also give me a lot. On a deep and profound level I don't want to be like "them". I don't want to act like them. I don't want to behave like them. Much - most of the abuse I suffered was in broad daylight and even the police were complicant. I don't want my life and the suffering I was subjected to to be for nothing. I am strong - I litterally would not have survived if I were not. I want to make a difference. I want to do so much good with my life that the evil that I was subjected to is reduced. I don't want to be normal. It is the normal people that allowed the hollocaust and they are also the one that watched 500,000 hands chopped off on their ****ing TVs in Rawanda.
I know that I am not supposed to write about sucide but I couln't live with myself if I had to just give up go over to their side. It is the HATE I have for their apathy that keeps me alive.
I have some good poetry on this and related subjects. Is this an appropriate place to post it?