I have been tryin g with all my might to push this from my thoughts and pretend like it is not the date! So..now that it has not worked......I have been thinking a lot about the assault and I still get the sickening feeling.
I have worked hard on this! Why does the anniversary still hold me? It is this weekend, like a lot of years ago!
It is funny...i tried for years to pretend that this was not me...it was a dream...it really didn't happen...I was just mixed up!
Now that I realize that only makes things worse...i have to realize that the anniversary date is just a trigger....it is not happening now! It sure was easier pretending. The consequences are pretty tough when you realize that this is totally not healthy and will one day come back to bite you in the ass! As it is today!
I have worked hard on this! Why does the anniversary still hold me? It is this weekend, like a lot of years ago!
It is funny...i tried for years to pretend that this was not me...it was a dream...it really didn't happen...I was just mixed up!
Now that I realize that only makes things worse...i have to realize that the anniversary date is just a trigger....it is not happening now! It sure was easier pretending. The consequences are pretty tough when you realize that this is totally not healthy and will one day come back to bite you in the ass! As it is today!