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sisu
Last Activity:
Nov 22, 2013
Joined:
Mar 17, 2008
Messages:
368
Likes Received:
375
Trophy Points:
513
Gender:
Female
Birthday:
September 11
Location:
USA ~ Midwest

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sisu

VIP Member, Female, from USA ~ Midwest

sisu was last seen:
Nov 22, 2013
    1. SweetLullaby
      SweetLullaby
      Hi sisu, HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
      Sending you my best wishes for a wonderful, healthy, healing, joyful new year of your life. Accompanied by true friends and smiling hearts.
      1. sisu likes this.
      2. sisu
        sisu
        Thank you so much! Having a 9/11 birthday in the U.S. is not so fun... :)
        Sep 11, 2013
    2. Froggie
      Froggie
      Dropped by to wish you a Happy Birthday !
      1. sisu likes this.
      2. sisu
        sisu
        Thank you so much!!
        Sep 12, 2012
    3. intothelight
      intothelight
      Happy Birthday!
      1. sisu likes this.
      2. sisu
        sisu
        Thank you so much!!
        Sep 12, 2012
    4. Jen93
      Jen93
      Love your profile picture. It cracks me up every time. :D
      1. sisu
        sisu
        Thank you for noticing... Ha!! ;P
        Apr 12, 2012
    5. Froggie
      Froggie
      Dropped by to wish you a Happy Birthday
      1. sisu
        sisu
        Thank you!!
        Sep 14, 2011
    6. May1321
      May1321
      Hi Sisu - I'm glad you found me. I started to read through your threads and we do sound like very similar situations... I'm at work but will read more. Sometimes looking at others outside their bubble allows us to inadvertantly see our own situations at work. Watching us mend our wings through this journey :) ~ May
      1. sisu
        sisu
        I joined this site almost 4 years ago....and when I go back to read my very early posts before/during and after the initial break up and how clueless I was about PTSD and read what I write now and have some more knowledge about this, it's very interesting to me. Glad we found each other too!!
        Apr 20, 2011
    7. Grama-Herc
      Grama-Herc
      Just dropped in to say Hello Have not heard from you in a very long time. HOw are you ding?
    8. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      Thanks Sisu, (for the compliment :-) I ain't so bad am I? :-)

      Bodhi is fantastic, a handful at times, but she is so worth it! She has in fact just had her first doggy shower. Oh and Bodhi is her name, it is the tree Buddha sat under when he found enlightenment, it means awakening! I thought this was very apt considering where I am on my journey.

      Spirit x
    9. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      Thanks Sisu,

      It is nice having you come along on parts of my journey :-) And, yes you are a, right plonker too! ha ha!

      I read the latest on you two and I am happy that you have each other. Nice and slow is good! You will know in time what he is meant to be in your life. Just take the time you have and enjoy the here and now!

      Spirit x
    10. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      I will edit them after you have reas them so that they are not up for all to see.

      Whatever his answer Sisu it will set me free. I have been feeling trapped by his confusion and unable to move forwards.

      I am prepared for whatever he has to say, I would not of sent it other wise!

      They go in order from bottom to top of page.

      Thanks Spirit x
    11. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      Last week after my good session and feeling very much in the here and now. I met him at his work, which is just down the road from my T. We walked along the canal in his lunch hour and it was lovely to be together. He kept holding me and smiling at me (that knowing smile)..When I left him he turned back to me and said don't you go going anywhere, this is just a break. He also brought a toy for my new puppy. I thanked him by email and he returned that and once again told me not to be going anywhere.

      This week he was very different! I chatted with him about his statement and he eventually admitted that it is because of his feelings for me. However, he said that the way I choose to deal with certain aspects of life still irritates him.

      Quite a few things were said, about me not being ready for a relationship for years....about how I had forced him to continue on with his life without me!

      I have addressed these comments and I am awaiting him to communicate with me.

      I feel that he can't have it both ways, if he does not know whether he wants me then he has to allow me to move on and he has made that difficult for me, by keep drawing back to him with the kind of comments he made the week before and since.

      He is a good man and he is no way manipulating me (you see how much I have grown), he is confused and I guess he is scared to take that leap of faith.

      I think he thinks that if I carry on with life that when I am cured we could have a chance. I will send you the mails I sent.

      You can see for your self what I said!

      Spirit x

      I will let you know ...............

      Spirit x

      I totallly get where he is coming from. He still loves me and wants to be with me, but obviously has his own fears over us getting back together, which are very valid
    12. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      Hey Sisu! I am glad to hear that you have remained friends! I guess it means that you have not permanatly close the door.

      Ant! I have given him some things to think about!

      Spirit x
    13. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      That is good to hear Sisu. Ant and I are on a similar path at the moment.....the future?........................................... How cares its the here and now that counts :-)

      love Spirit x
    14. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      Hey Sisu!

      Thank you for sharing in these moments. I just know it will last for it is me that has created it :-) What a great lesson I have learned :-)

      Dare I say it?........I am healing!

      How you doing sausage?

      Spirit x
    15. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      Thank you for your comment in my diary. Hope all is well.

      Spirit x
    16. blueeyedgirl
      blueeyedgirl
      Congrats Sisu! It takes alot to say 'goodbye' and mean it. I'm sending many, many hugs your way!!
    17. samsara
      samsara
      You feeling stronger? I think you did the right thing, listening to your head and your heart, they can work in unison. Just some advice, now you have done it, maintain your dignity and word. Do not feed and nourish that part of you which hopes to rekindle anything with him. Instead, understand that you will grieve the loss of the relationship, even though it hasn't been happy and healthy for some time. Give yourself some time to grieve, and time to heal. And focus on the good thing's you definately have and make you who you are -- wonderful.
    18. samsara
      samsara
      yeah we're good mate. the storm has cleared and we are now closer than ever.
      it's just a baby step, by baby step. thanks for checking in.
      i hope you're looking after yourself.
    19. samsara
      samsara
      i dunno mate. i'm all adviced out on your situation except for that i have already offered you.
    20. blueeyedgirl
      blueeyedgirl
      Thank you for your friendship request. Please keep us updated on how you are doing!
    21. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      You made me smile :-)
      Read my comment! ha ha!

      Spirit x
    22. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      We have not named her yet! You have given me a good idea actually.

      Spirit x
    23. spiritofnow
      spiritofnow
      Hey Sisu!
      Thank you for your friends request!
      I thought I would start to fill up your virtual page here :-)

      Spirit x
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  • About

    Gender:
    Female
    Birthday:
    September 11
    Location:
    USA ~ Midwest
    I am single mother with two teenage daughters. My boyfriend is an Army veteran with combat PTSD. I am learning about myself and about his PTSD every single day both with experience and this online community.
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