mumstheword
MyPTSD Pro
I annoy my partner when I apologize to my kids for things I shouldn't. Sometimes he gets mad at me and tells me off about it in front of them and then I feel like apologizing for apologizing and so on.
It comes from shame and bad treatment from my mum and my long-term partner and father of my children. They would both constantly belittle me, shame me, undermine me, criticize me, blame me and gaslight me. I used to cut myself when I lived with my mum because of it, and became a groveler with my ex.
Now, after so much verbal and emotional abuse, I let my children get away with too much and apologize to them for stupid stuff. It's a catch-22, as I feel shame so I apologize and then feel shame for apologizing. Hard habit to break. I would love some feedback on how to break it.
It comes from shame and bad treatment from my mum and my long-term partner and father of my children. They would both constantly belittle me, shame me, undermine me, criticize me, blame me and gaslight me. I used to cut myself when I lived with my mum because of it, and became a groveler with my ex.
Now, after so much verbal and emotional abuse, I let my children get away with too much and apologize to them for stupid stuff. It's a catch-22, as I feel shame so I apologize and then feel shame for apologizing. Hard habit to break. I would love some feedback on how to break it.