NotApplicable
Learning
So I've been in therapy for 6 months not for ptsd but for bpd.
I was diagnosed with ptsd but I forced my psychiatrist to not write it down on the letter that I had to give my therapist to be accepted for dbt (what im doing now). Don't ask me why, it seemed a good idea at the time.
When my therapist took my history she asked me about trauma and I briefly told her I was raped by my boyfriend when in high school (just that). There were times where it came up in sessions but we never talked about it more as in dbt, talking about trauma in detail comes in a later stage. I told her about nightmares few months ago but not the content of it.
Tomorrow is the anniversary of that date and since yesterday I've been really upset and triggered. I hardly slept last night due to nightmares and today I'm having constant flashbacks that make me suicidal. As I am in crisis, I contacted her to help me use skills and she asked me what happened and I couldn't talk. I can't even say the word "rape". She told me as I can't talk about it, to write everything i feel down on a paper and If I can to send her a message as to what is tomorrow.
I really want to, but I have no idea how and what to write in the text. I just need to get it out of my chest.
I was diagnosed with ptsd but I forced my psychiatrist to not write it down on the letter that I had to give my therapist to be accepted for dbt (what im doing now). Don't ask me why, it seemed a good idea at the time.
When my therapist took my history she asked me about trauma and I briefly told her I was raped by my boyfriend when in high school (just that). There were times where it came up in sessions but we never talked about it more as in dbt, talking about trauma in detail comes in a later stage. I told her about nightmares few months ago but not the content of it.
Tomorrow is the anniversary of that date and since yesterday I've been really upset and triggered. I hardly slept last night due to nightmares and today I'm having constant flashbacks that make me suicidal. As I am in crisis, I contacted her to help me use skills and she asked me what happened and I couldn't talk. I can't even say the word "rape". She told me as I can't talk about it, to write everything i feel down on a paper and If I can to send her a message as to what is tomorrow.
I really want to, but I have no idea how and what to write in the text. I just need to get it out of my chest.