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  1. L

    Emdr difficulties--looking fro advice from pros

    Does your therapist have headphones or vibrating paddles you can hold in your hand? I found it distracting moving my eyes and also they got tired. It's also totally OK to take it slowly and hold just one thought or image in your mind. I hope you're able to discuss your concerns with your...
  2. L

    Other First Time So Hi, And Emdr?

    EMDR can be very effective in healing trauma. I'm mostly a supporter, have had some small-t trauma and some symptoms, and EMDR helped me work through it. The first thing your therapist will probably do with you is build up your positive resources (with and without EMDR) and help you learn...
  3. L

    Why Do Only Some Traumas Create Ptsd?

    This is a good question, and really interesting. @Tesseract has a big part of it. - If you are helpless during the traumatic event, chances are higher that you'll develop symptoms. - If you have little or no social support after the traumatic event, chances are higher you'll develop symptoms...
  4. L

    Relationship Does Anyone Else Ever Feel….

    Being in a relationship with a PTSD sufferer is a huge challenge, no question. Mood swings, anger, trust issues. When he's upset with me, he knows just the thing to do or say that will hurt the most. And I can't be angry at him or criticize him. It feels sometimes like parenting, the way a child...
  5. L

    Relationship New And Lost

    I get the catch-22 situation when he is stressed out and reacting with anger. It is NOT your fault. However, if the two of you are going to make it, the two of you together will have to figure out how to cope. You will have to communicate during a time that he's not stressed. Don't blame him...
  6. L

    Relationship Setting Boundaries And Giving Feedback

    Well done, @MorningDove! Boundaries are excellent!
  7. L

    Do You Get Many Somatic Reactions When You Talk About Difficult Stuff?

    Yes, Somatic Experiencing therapy was developed/discovered by Peter Levine. There is a directory of Somatic Experiencing practitioners on his website, www.traumahealing.org. His organization runs trainings and also has many books and other materials.
  8. L

    EMDR Lashback - When EMDR Goes Wrong

    It's absolutely important to get someone with enough of the right kind of experience to walk down that road with you. I will say however that in order to get certified to even use EMDR in a therapeutic setting, you have to already have an advanced degree or certification in counseling. The...
  9. L

    General Ptsd Breeds Ptsd Imho

    The community here can support you in some ways. There are places here to vent and to ask for help and advice. But it's essential to take care of yourself. @Justmehere is spot on. I've been with my boyfriend for almost six years. I couldn't have done it without the support of my therapist, and...
  10. L

    Ptsd Coming To The Front In Therapy Now...

    Congratulations on opening up! I am so glad your current therapist is someone you can trust more than the previous ones. You can't just talk about past trauma and have it be OK by talking. Talk therapy rarely works on past trauma. Trauma gets under your skin, it's still living inside you in...
  11. L

    Beginning To Thrive, What Does That Mean To You???

    This is a wonderful thread. As a supporter, I am always glad to see good things happening for folks who had a lot less good stuff in the past. Lion, if you feel like you have gone through a doorway, or are in the process of going through it, why not do something to commemorate your passage...
  12. L

    Somatic Experiencing Question

    Glad you're on the path to healing. I can imagine that if that huge scary overwhelming feeling comes up near the end of a session, that's bad timing and there isn't time to get anywhere near it, start working through it, anything like that. I imagine that you and your therapist will do some...
  13. L

    Not Sure If I Have Ptsd

    There are various websites that list the symptoms associated with PTSD. You can check the list against your experiences and feelings. However only a medical professional can diagnose. Not everyone who is suffering seeks medical attention, but I can assure you that any medical professional who...
  14. L

    Your Pain As Inspiration For Art, On Display

    Abstract, with all due respect, it is possible that you are projecting a bit here. I don't believe I have suggested in any way that my bf is unreasonable in his choice not to read the script, or that he took too much time, or that there is or was anything wrong with his reaction. You quoted me...
  15. L

    Your Pain As Inspiration For Art, On Display

    Very sorry about how I've come across regarding him being upset. Yes of course, he is upset about something that is under my control, that I have done. I was speaking as a supporter here, only, with respect to MY experience of him being upset. It is upsetting to me when he is upset...
  16. L

    Your Pain As Inspiration For Art, On Display

    Well, I've got some reaction from him. He was procrastinating looking at the script, for whatever reason (probably multiple reasons, I'm sure you can think of a few). Soon after I gave it to him, he said something silly about writing a musical, and I got a bit prickly. I emailed him to...
  17. L

    Confused With Therapy, Therapist, Diagnosis

    Just to answer the question about why I'm embarrassed to have two therapists: I'm not a trauma survivor, I'm a supporter, although I am suffering from secondary trauma because I continue to be in a relationship with someone who has untreated cPTSD. I could choose to leave my boyfriend, but I...
  18. L

    How To Cultivate A Friends With Benefits

    I'd like to second the vote that you try looking for polyamorous men. Particularly men who are already in a primary relationship. The poly world has expanded and evolved a lot in the past 15-20 years. I've been in it for longer than that and I agree, there were and are definitely some weirdos...
  19. L

    Your Pain As Inspiration For Art, On Display

    Thanks again for the input. I just wanted to let folks know that I gave a draft of my musical to my bf a couple of days ago. I shared a slightly earlier draft with a potential composer, but other than that, my bf is the first reader. I annotated all the scenes with a summary of their content...
  20. L

    Confused With Therapy, Therapist, Diagnosis

    I would suggest you look for a trauma therapist. There is no reason you can't stay with the therapist you like as well. I am embarrassed to admit it, but I have two therapists. They both have experience with trauma; one uses hypnosis and body work, and the other is certified in EMDR. It's nice...
  21. L

    Doctor Says I'm Making Great Progress

    That's a huge and wonderful thing, to not only be healing but to be a good example!
  22. L

    My Soul Is In Such Pain

    I am sorry that triggers are so pervasive, even in the media that you use to escape and self-soothe. I'm glad you've seen improvement in the past six months. You're making big progress. Hold onto that. You're walking through the dangerous swamp, and you've chosen to do that walk, because...
  23. L

    General Therapy Assessment

    So glad to hear that your husband is on this path, amethist. Wishing both of you strength.
  24. L

    General Any Suggestions For Supporters When Sufferer Is Triggered? Frustrated.

    Mistyeyed, it sounds to me like while the apparent issue is coping with your bf when he blows up, there is also stress building up in you. Anger, frustration, irritation, sadness, the whole stew supporters have to deal with when we've been with a sufferer for a length of time. Also, it may seem...
  25. L

    General I Wish I Did Not Take His Problems Upon Myself So Much

    Chiming in to say - I doubt that pastoral counseling can heal trauma. Your husband needs to see a therapist with expertise in trauma. I personally am partial to EMDR and that works for a lot of people, but not for everyone. - Take care of yourself. Take care of yourself. Take care of yourself...
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