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  1. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Lol. Well, that didn't last long. Quit pros. And pretty sure I've quit therapy, just not formally yet. And it's really all fine. I am drawing away, and enjoying it. I made a whole coloring book of the 28 mental fitness tools. Hmmmm... I wonder if I could share it here somehow....
  2. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Thanks always @ladee!!!! hugs!!!!!!
  3. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    It's personalized recovery oriented services. Step down from partial. I signed up for 3 groups a day, 4 days a week. Monday: Taking Charge Emotion Regulation Mindfulness Tuesday: ACT Skills Distress Tolerance Meditation Wednesday: Hack Your Brain Goal Planning Nutrition and Exercise Thursday...
  4. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    I'm so excited! I'm so excited! I start PROS on Monday and I think I'll like it!
  5. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Cool cool. Flipped again. I guess the main takeaway is, chill. Nothing is forever. I have to just keep remembering that.
  6. Bananie

    Actually contemplating this...how do i tell my therapist?

    I told two t's recently how I have been planning and practicing. Neither really cared. Which is fine. I don't think I care much anymore either. Definitely go ahead and tell, at least professionals. They're trained to be able to handle it. Good luck!
  7. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Thanks @ladee and @SpiritSong , I appreciate you. I love to draw, and I've been working mostly on typography lately, and actually thinking it is sort of good. (Lazy Goddess on FB, if you wanna see). But then I just think, so what? What does that do? What's the point? What's the point of...
  8. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Well that flipped real quick. Ready to check out again. I won't leave my cat. No offense to anyone else, but, for reals, other than her, everyone would be better off without me. And she probably would be, but she only likes me. At least there's sleep. I love sleep.
  9. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Can't believe it's been since January since I've written here! And I'm doing it cause I reeeeeaaaalllllly feel like contacting old t. Not because I feel bad. I'm pretty ok, ATM. I just miss him. Oh well! Last week I was ready to finally end myself. Giving in to the belief that I am worthless...
  10. Bananie

    Just looking for feedback, i guess - reaction to appointment summary

    Oh wow there are responses about the phrase, I just didn't see. So sorry guys, I'll get it together one day.
  11. Bananie

    Just looking for feedback, i guess - reaction to appointment summary

    Thanks everyone for reading and responding. I just looked briefly for now, as I'm off to work, but I really appreciate it I know I wasn't specific enough, but I was kinda more looking for reactions to the "given what you were experiencing, isolating yourself makes sense". I will read more in...
  12. Bananie

    Just looking for feedback, i guess - reaction to appointment summary

    I get these after visit summaries from my t. They're basic, just what I talked about, his response, goals and plan. Digression already; At my first appointment he said, I send after visit summaries if you want them, do you want them? And I said, sure, why not? And he said some people don't like...
  13. Bananie

    Such a little thing, but...

    I finally bought a pair of shoes! I've been wearing (really falling apart) sneakers against dress code to work lately because I couldn't bear to wear the only acceptable pair of shoes I had because they had a slight heel, and I just couldn't seem to get to a store. I hate shopping, I hate the...
  14. Bananie

    I thought i was nearly over it

    Many many hugs to you. I feel like I could've written this post myself. My t left the practice I was seeing him at about a year ago, very abruptly. Ive contacted him a few times since to see if we could work together again and never heard back. I still think of him every day. I've been seeing...
  15. Bananie

    How graphic are you with your therapist?

    I've never been able to give specific details, and I really don't think anyone should have to if they don't want to, but I did say "I'm afraid he has like miracle jizz or something" to this t and he took it in stride. I think you can tell them whatever you feel comfortable though. They've heard...
  16. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Just read the first chapter of.... crud what is it... well it's the skills training manual for dbt, lent to me by new t. Technically I'm supposed to be working on emotion regulation, but I wanted to read the whole thing. It may take awhile. Boy is my concentration shot! That's ok. It's not like...
  17. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Ramble ramble Gotta make it thru the whole day at work today. Left early again yesterday. Meh. Whatever. Ok, yesterday the new part(?) Said "i know how i failed to take you down before." "Oh? How's that?" "Take away your hope, all beliefs, any thing you liked....hey, you're not gonna get me...
  18. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    How did a day that started off ok go downhill so fast? I woke up early, like i have been, and that's ok, i wasn't mad about that. I was actually kinda dancing and singing in the shower and was like, oh good! Fun annie is back! Got to work, wasn't looking forward to it, as usual, but i was...
  19. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Thanks @ladee . I know, I know. I know it's all ok. Well. Parts of me do, perhaps. And other parts are warring with those parts to say no, it's not. Oh, lol. Still appropriate that my diary is name feels like I'm waging a war! Lmao! Hugs back, thanks
  20. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Uuuuuuuugggggghhhhhhhh I am not cut out for this life thing.
  21. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Well i don't hate him, so, that's a plus lol So now, I want to check with my insurance and see if i can see two people, or, just stop with current t. I thought about it after i saw her on saturday that without consciously doing it, i may have prepped her for my flight by telling her that i have...
  22. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Last week I finally gave myself permission to email old t and say I am not moving forward how I'd like, and asking if we could work together again. He has not replied, and i think i expected that, but i also think that just by letting myself e-mail, i put him behind me. After a few days i did a...
  23. Bananie

    I just broke my therapist's chair :(

    Oh, she didn't make me feel bad about it at all.
  24. Bananie

    Feels Like I'm Waging A War

    Just ocurred, want to remember. I used to be a think for myselfer, but these days if im not being told what to do, i just exist.
  25. Bananie

    Slowly collapsing like a flan in a cupboard - talk to supervisor &/or human resources?

    Thanks @Freida I actually ended up getting mha'ed from work on Thursday, so....they know what's going on now. Very embarrassing. I see my t today. I'll see what she suggests.
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