Search results

  1. T

    Memory & Time Issues, Past and Present

    I have both short and long term memory loss. I feel mine is associated with past head trauma's. I have found that even under the extreme diress of close quarters combat the training I recieved is so engrained into my being that I don't even think, it just happens. That being said, I think a...
  2. T

    My Thanks to Motorjack

    I want to openly thank Motorjack for several things. Firstly, Motorjack was part of a UN convoy that in all reality saved my life along with my squad of Rangers lives in Somalia. It's a small world. Were both from different countries yet we both shed blood in the same place. Secondly, I spent...
  3. T

    Parasympathetic Nervous System (Fight or Flight) - A Strategic Approach

    I embrace the night. Daylight is what bothers me. Here is a thought process that may help. Remember, when its totally dark, you know where you are, noone else does. If someone approaches you, you know where they are, they have no clue your there. This comes from a combat enviroment but it may...
  4. T

    Do You Wakeup in a Cold Sweat at Night?

    I wake up in cold sweats, I don't take trazadone and unfortunately I remember EVERYTHING I dream
  5. T

    How Do You All Handle The Dark?

    I embrace the night. Daylight is what bothers me. Here is a thought process that may help. Remember, when its totally dark, you know where you are, noone else does. If someone approaches you, you know where they are, they have no clue your there. This comes from a combat enviroment but it may...
  6. T

    Stack it on Top - Then Stack on More

    Hey MJ, thanks man. Im really worried they are going to medical me out. I dont fit into this country at all right now. I find myself really closed off, and acting like I am still in a combat zone. When I do sleep I sleep fully dressed with my weapon. My family is supportive and my father, being...
  7. T

    Stack it on Top - Then Stack on More

    Thank you all so much. This is tough, were not supposed to show any kind of weakness. I have an MRI, CT, scheduled for monday and had an appt. today for the problem with my eye. The ophthalmologist told me today that the problem with my eye was from oxygen altitude deprevation and the problem...
  8. T

    Stack it on Top - Then Stack on More

    I recently witnessed as 2 of my fellow soldiers were killed. There were a total of 4 of us. We were put into an area to do a specific mission and as we were put into the are the person putting us in became nervous and basically dumped us. I watched 2 of my guys go straight into the ground...
  9. T

    How's Your Day Been? Each Day is Different, So Make Your Mark Daily

    Painful mentally and physically due to the death of yet another one of my brothers. Anger, rage, revengeful, hatred, disgust, and complete uncaring.
  10. T

    What Music / Song Do You Listen To When PTSD Is In Full Effect?

    black then white are all i see in my infancy red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me lets me see as below, so above and beyond, i imagine drawn beyond the lines of reason push the envelope watch it bend over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind withering my...
  11. T

    General Deployment - I Am Stressed

    If I can be of any help I will try to help you out as much as I can. Im in the sandtrap atm as well.
  12. T

    The War in Iraq

    Its all in perception. Some forces are occupation forces, others are active combat units. The majority of operation in Iraq atm are active combat units. Military intelligence (oxymoron noted) gives out missions depending on the type. Some may be a large force engaging insurgents house to house...
  13. T

    Beyond PTSD Introductions - Who Are You?

    Here is a letter I wrote to the woman I am totally in love with, she moved on because of my military career but later told me she would have done anything and waited however long. This is my story.... It was amazing to get to talk to you on the phone for so long today. I have to admit, when we...
  14. T

    The War in Iraq

    The real deal in Iraq. 2 choices. Pull out every American force like some of these idiot political presidential candidates want to do in 60 days. Want to know what is going to happen? I'll tell you. Mass genocide. On a scale not seen since WWII. You want the real truth now? We will be involved...
  15. T

    Beyond PTSD Introductions - Who Are You?

    I have finally talked with a therapist about everything, he thinks it would be a good idea to kinda let me hair down. I think this is the best forum for me. I was recently brought stateside for political reasons. This country amazes me. I drive around and it's like noone realized there is a war...
  16. T

    PTSD and Military Service

    Anthony and others. Do you feel there is a point where a human can become more animalistic that human? You mention beheaded bodies, they don't bother me anymore. My thought is if I just put it out of my mind, It'll just blend in with everything else and it won't stick out as spectacular or...
  17. T

    What Am I Here For? I Keep Volunteering for Deployment

    One additional thought on the political situation unfolding in the US and the Iraq policies these policiticans want to impose. They are not even considering the innocent Iraqi people. If we remove every soldier in 60 days we will see genocide on a level that the world has not witnessed since...
  18. T

    What Am I Here For? I Keep Volunteering for Deployment

    Grace, thank you. As I have said, I am struggling hard with religion. I have sat here and read the book of Job about 2 times. I don't know why Im drawn to this book of the bible, maybe I feel like Im being tested. Grace, your words mean the world to me. The people on this forum are amazing...
  19. T

    PTSD and Military Service

    Brother, Im in your shoes. It never goes away imo. You may tame it, but it comes back to me. I haven't had official treatment yet. I hope to eventually. If your in-country the thing to do is to do as your trained. Be aggressive but be safe. I will be here on occasion. In a few days Im going on...
  20. T

    What Am I Here For? I Keep Volunteering for Deployment

    Im blown away, I've never felt so many people had the same problem as me. The words all of you speak hit home. Ok, Im going to spill it. As brutal as this is, some of you may not want to read this. The absolute truth of the matter is I have so much aggression, hatred, and rage pent up...
  21. T

    What Am I Here For? I Keep Volunteering for Deployment

    How do you handle the flashbacks? The everynight nightmares? This happens 24/7 to me. Im in a unit that if you show ANY weakness your out. When I came here I was a very religious person, now I feel as if I have shamed everything I believe in. I understand people are tired of hearing about this...
  22. T

    What Am I Here For? I Keep Volunteering for Deployment

    In the sandtrap. I see people die, sometimes by the hundreds. Ive been diagnosed with PTSD and Thanatos. I keep volunteering to come back. I can't explain why I come back. I feel I will never be normal again. Civilians don't understand us. I've known soldiers who come back from Iraq/Stan and end...
  23. T

    I'm Lost, Totally Lost and Don't Know Where To Turn.

    ^^^ Tank. I am sure you have heard this 100 times. This rings true. From this day to the ending of the world we in it shall be remembered. We lucky few, we band of brothers. For he who today sheds his blood with me shall be my brother. I will be here to listen anytime you need. There are...
  24. T

    I'm Lost, Totally Lost and Don't Know Where To Turn.

    Another event, Im going to talk it out. There is a kid near the town Im in now, an Iraqi child, who is just a great kid. When we first moved into this area the natives were nervous with us being here as we are not a conventional fighting force which led to some tension at first. Over time I...
  25. T

    I'm Lost, Totally Lost and Don't Know Where To Turn.

    Thanks Veiled, I appreciatte your response. I am going to state now that I am going to get something off my chest that is one of the major factors of my PTSD. My suggestion to people who are sensative, vunerable, or having a difficult time dealing with their own emotional problems may want to...
Back
Top