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Am i the only frequent mover

Discussion in 'Avoidance' started by WhiteHatGirl, Nov 19, 2017.

  1. Flip flop

    Flip flop Active Member

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    Quite interesting topic. I wish I could just pack up and leave at any time. There’s nothing wrong with my current situation. I just hate feeling stuck. I used to love moving in my youth. Always being able to either make a fresh start or escape drama and bad situations, crappy people, etc. One reason I haven’t moved recently is because I’m afraid of leaving the frying pan for the fire. Can’t afford that risk. I have to remind myself daily that I have it good where I am and work to convince myself to stay put.

    Thanks to the OP for bringing this subject up.
     
    Ronin and Buttercup like this.
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  3. WhiteHatGirl

    WhiteHatGirl Active Member

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    19 times in 10 years. Yeah, I bet I've done that. So sad! So Frustrating. I just want to feel safe in housing. Even when I had an Apt. for a year alone, it was in an aweful complex I hated that was for the poor and foster kids ran away and the cops would show up wandering around looking for them. It was sooooo unsettling most of the time. I even fought a bunch with the landlords!
     
    scout86 likes this.
  4. trying2movefwd

    trying2movefwd I'm a VIP

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    I have moved ALOT over the course of my life! It's like I start getting close to folk and then once we get "too close" I up and move cause I would rather people not know much about me..and yet I desire deep meaningful friendships. It's like another on here said...I keep moving until I "get it right".
     
  5. WhiteHatGirl

    WhiteHatGirl Active Member

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    You are welcome.
     
    Ice_Fire and Buttercup like this.
  6. Ice_Fire

    Ice_Fire Keep your head up, Keep your heart strong Premium Member Donated

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    I've not moved as much as I would like to have, but I'm always feeling like I want to move. I've never settled. Growing up I moved once from my parents to my grandparents, then they split up and we moved three times in two years. Stayed there for 4 years until I went to uni and then I was stuck in the uni city (where I still am) and had to move every 8/9 months or so just because of short-term student lets. I'm in my own rented place now and I've been here 18 months and I've got majorly itchy feet now!
     
    Bearlinda likes this.
  7. KwanYingirl

    KwanYingirl I'm a VIP

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    Not only have I moved frequently since childhood, I move from room to room within homes trying to find a safe place to sleep. I call them my nocturnal migrations. So far my present situation has been calm. I am getting reiki and shamanic journeying which has dampened my fear response to the point that I am actively trying to just stay present and stop running away. Once I counted my moves and it’s up to 37 now. It’s totally PTSD based and then always the disappointment that moving doesn’t solve my problems.
     
    Bearlinda likes this.
  8. Beans

    Beans Well-Known Member

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    We moved a ton in my upbringing. Not due to military or anything, there was just always a reason in that chaotic mess of a household. Now older, my mom was recommending me move some place else if it didnt work out here (where I am.) I realized that's her go to. Wherever you go, there you are. Moving is not always the answer. My issues are issues that need to be sit with in therapy and work through. NOt moving and hoping something will take somewhere else. Unsuprisingly, my mom is still dealing with her same issues from 30 yrs ago.

    I was actually just thinking yesterday, I want to give myself a home. Someplace stable, all mine, where i can relax, where my things are, where i have control, where i am welcome and wanted, etc. I have never had that. My childhood situation was always volatile and i've carried that within me. I'm looking to give myself a home and stability now. That's my next major goal. I want it to be a place all my own, where I"ll live until i'm ready to move in with or marry my future husband. I want to stay put and get to know my neighbors and neighborhood and just create a life that is a reflection of my true self. Yea that sounds amazing. Home for the first time at 30. I deserve it.
     
  9. KwanYingirl

    KwanYingirl I'm a VIP

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    @Beans. You are so right! Wherever I go there I am. I did finally find a small space that’s mine. Not having to deal with drama. Four years in and I am still struggling to get out and explore my neighborhood.
     
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