Hello,
I have been reading tons and tons about PTSD for the past 6 weeks. My bf of 8 months, out of the blue, decided that he no longer wanted to be with me and has pushed me out of his life. He does not answer his phone and rarely answers emails. We were so close for those 8 months. He was so open, caring, loving, talked about a future together. We had both had previous marriages and obviously had baggage. We have 6 kids between us (me 2, him 4). I knew he had PTSD from being in the Army, he has been out since 2004. I really didn't know what PTSD was and I saw no symptoms during our 8 months together. One evening, on January 29 2008, I made a comment like I would like to be married again someday in my life. Apparently that comment freaked him out. He said he didn't know if he could ever be married again. A while later I said, how would you feel if I dated other people. I know, bad move, but I was just trying to get a dialogue going as he had alredy started to shut down. It seems like the PTSD attack suddenly came on and he retreated into his cave. He pushed away everyone who loves and cares about him. He told me he is not deserving of my love and I would have to prove to him that he is worthy of me. He said that he is good at pushing people away and that is just what he does best. He told me it would be best if I just moved on and forgot about him. Then I found he had posted a profile of himself on an online dating site. I confronted him aobut it and he had a severe panic attack ~ he thought he was going to die. He said that he wished he had. We have talked a handful of times and met for lunch once since we broke up. He says that he is a coward and cannot forgive himself for the way he treated me. Some of his symptoms are classic case. But I think that maybe he is also using his PTSD as an excuse or crutch so he doesn't have to face diffcult situations. I am a very open, loving, warm and genuine person. I truly do love this man and I know that he can handle his PTSD better than he has been.
Is there anything that I can say or do to get through to him??
Sisu
I have been reading tons and tons about PTSD for the past 6 weeks. My bf of 8 months, out of the blue, decided that he no longer wanted to be with me and has pushed me out of his life. He does not answer his phone and rarely answers emails. We were so close for those 8 months. He was so open, caring, loving, talked about a future together. We had both had previous marriages and obviously had baggage. We have 6 kids between us (me 2, him 4). I knew he had PTSD from being in the Army, he has been out since 2004. I really didn't know what PTSD was and I saw no symptoms during our 8 months together. One evening, on January 29 2008, I made a comment like I would like to be married again someday in my life. Apparently that comment freaked him out. He said he didn't know if he could ever be married again. A while later I said, how would you feel if I dated other people. I know, bad move, but I was just trying to get a dialogue going as he had alredy started to shut down. It seems like the PTSD attack suddenly came on and he retreated into his cave. He pushed away everyone who loves and cares about him. He told me he is not deserving of my love and I would have to prove to him that he is worthy of me. He said that he is good at pushing people away and that is just what he does best. He told me it would be best if I just moved on and forgot about him. Then I found he had posted a profile of himself on an online dating site. I confronted him aobut it and he had a severe panic attack ~ he thought he was going to die. He said that he wished he had. We have talked a handful of times and met for lunch once since we broke up. He says that he is a coward and cannot forgive himself for the way he treated me. Some of his symptoms are classic case. But I think that maybe he is also using his PTSD as an excuse or crutch so he doesn't have to face diffcult situations. I am a very open, loving, warm and genuine person. I truly do love this man and I know that he can handle his PTSD better than he has been.
Is there anything that I can say or do to get through to him??
Sisu