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Bubble Girl - People Just Don't Get It

Discussion in 'General' started by lucy, Oct 4, 2006.

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  1. lucy

    lucy New Member

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    CONVERSATIONS IN MY NEW LIFE LIVING WITH PTSD

    Counselor: “Give your anger to God
    Me: “But why should I pile all my anger on him, that’s not fair.”

    Counselor: “He can handle it, when they made you cry he cried too, he Loves you.”

    Me: “Okay I’ll try to give him my anger but I wish he would give me some kind of sign that they will pay for what they did to me and be punished.”

    Counselor: (Perplexed look on his face)

    Me: “Wait a minute; did you say they made God cry too? Well now I’m even angrier. I think I can forgive them for hurting me but they had no right to make God cry. Who in the hell do they think they are???? Can I be mad at them for that?”

    Couselor: (Perplexed look on his face)
    ............
    Sister: “It’s good you’re trying to forgive but you also need to forget.”

    Me: “No my counselor told me that it’s okay that I still remember because sometimes you can’t help but remember.”

    Sister: “Okay, but try to remember it as a lesson learned in life.”

    Me: “Well I didn’t ask for this lesson. I was doing just dandy before I learned this lesson. In my life before I had the control. If I wanted to learn something I’d enroll in a class or something and learn something useful something that would increase my knowledge and help me grown. This lesson didn’t help me grown. This lesson took part of me without my consent. This lesson broke me as a person, changed me forever and trie as I might, I see no advantage in the lesson these people pushed on me. Running into them hasn’t improved my life. It has however brought to my attention that there really is truly evil people in the world. However, I was happier than a basket full of bunnies in my naïve state before this happened believing that life was good, people were basically good, and this was a world where justice prevailed..

    Sister: “Look at it this way. They have to live with themselves.”

    Me: “Yes they do and they are still whole, I’m not, they stole part of me, I no longer recognize myself in the mirror. I no longer remember who I was. I woke up to a different world and have no idea how to get it back.They however probably woke up the next day ate breakfast and went to church. They probably haven’t even thought about me other than to chuckle. They had so much fun that night with me. They didn’t look like unhappy people to me they were enjoying themselves. The more I fell apart the giddier they got. I think you call that a type of mob mentality. They were sadistic bullies, inhuman, something in their eyes was missing. I'll never forget the eyes. I miss myself and the life I had before this happened.

    Sister: Your still you.

    Me: (thinking to myself) “Than how come I no longer feel like me?” How come I literally feel like I’m out of my body living in a bubble?” I’m not nuts, I know who the president is, I know what year it is where I’m at who I am and I don’t see little pink pigs wearing tutus flying around the room. But to feel this way is nuts so okay maybe I am nuts, that neither makes me feel better or worse. Nuts can be good I guess. But living in this bubble is getting really really old and I feel so lonely. Can I tell her I feel like I’m a bubble?”

    Me: Dear sister I feel like I’m living in a bubble.”

    Sister: Well just don’t let that stop you from doing everything you did before this happened. Keep doing things even though you’re in a bubble.

    Me: But sister it’s so frustrating. I want out of this bubble.

    Sister: The reality is that you are in the bubble and you can’t let it keep you from moving on with your life. Just take the bubble with you or float around in it, whatever you do in a bubble but don’t let it hinder you.

    Me: “But sister, the bubble won’t fit in my car it’s too bulky.

    Sister: Well then take the convertible.

    Sister and Me: (both thinking) “Am I really having this weird conversation?”

    Sister/Me: “Ha Ha Ha."

    The only thing I know to do at this point in my life is try to accept my predicament and laugh. Laughter does tend to help somehow. When I cry my face and eyes get all puffy and to see me cry is not very pleasant because I tend to snort like a pig.
    Thank you,

    God Bless.
     
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  3. YoungAndAngry

    YoungAndAngry Well-Known Member

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    Hi Lucy,

    I can understand talking to a religious counselor, but when they are just telling you to "forgive and forget", I don't agree with that.

    You need to deal with your trauma, not avoid it.
    That doesn't mean you have to go against your faith, but I don't think just "giving your anger to God" is going to heal you.
    Something tramautic happened to you, it shouldn't be ignored.

    Take care of yourself
    Y&A
     
    Kas_Can_Fly likes this.
  4. scarlette_crimson

    scarlette_crimson Active Member

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    I agree Y&A

    We some how need to take religon out of the way after all the good part of religon did not do this to us in the first place.:hello:
     
  5. No-Twitch-Tabitha

    No-Twitch-Tabitha Well-Known Member

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    My Goodness, that was hilarious. Sometimes I wonder whether a counselor is talking more to you or to himself when he says "forgive and forget". I'm all for the forgiving, but forgetting is another matter entirely.
     
  6. cdunny

    cdunny Active Member

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    I saw my pastor about what happened. He told me to give it to God and not to talk to anybody about it. And then he said that we'd just "Pray that the Good Lord Kills him". HAHAHA. I love my pastor and he actually made me feel pretty good about the whole thing.. But dang that was funny. That conversation sounds like a conversation I would have with my brother. Thats great. I love siblings.
     
    Kas_Can_Fly likes this.
  7. anthony

    anthony Renovation Aficionado Founder

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    Hi Lucy, welcome aboard. Lucy, I have one thing to say about your counsellor, "GET ANOTHER ONE". I will leave that at that.

    Your sister has some typical points from a person who doesn't understand, because how could they understand something they cannot experience, though she also has some relevant points, which boarder more into realistic commonsense solutions. This is what dealing with PTSD is all about.

    The lesson learned in life.... well, all I can say is for your case, your statement is true. For someone like myself, war scenario, I signed on the dotted line, so that statement is true for myself to a certain point. Rape, abuse or sexual abuse is not a lesson learned, it is the worst of humanity being inflicted upon a person without their consent. Going to war had my consent, yours did not. Big difference, case by case basis.

    Lets get to your anger Lucy... Tell me why your angry? To do this, you need to know that anger is not an emotion, instead anger is actually an emotional response to emotions, for example: if you feel pain, hurt, abused, taken advantage, isolated, etc etc... these are emotions, which combined could result in anger, being the emotional response.

    So, what is making your angry?
     
    Kas_Can_Fly likes this.
  8. goingonhope

    goingonhope Member Premium Member

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    Lucy, Just like No- Twitch Tabitha said, that was absolutely hilarious. At first reading I thought you were creatively expressing how others might respond in this type of conversation with us. Now I think differently. The counselor and sister statements blow my mind. Someone recently told me to forgive, move on and know that the (the victimizer) is suffering to and will have to live with this. Ooooh so annoying and pure crap from what I see.
     
  9. anthony

    anthony Renovation Aficionado Founder

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    I wouldn't say that the victimizer suffering is pure crap, because often they don't know or understand the implications of their own stupid actions when doing it. This however does not ever excuse anothers actions. Some people are just evil and feel no remorse, others snap, have a bad day, buildup of life stressors, whatever the case may be, and hence some poor innocent person ends up the the wrong end of their frustrations. Again, never an excuse though for those that commit an act, because they control themselves.
     
    Kas_Can_Fly likes this.
  10. Nam

    Nam I'm a VIP

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    Welcome Lucy. I too had someone tell me to "leave it to God". Something that just made me look at her like, are you absolutely crazy? Where I was, at that moment was a place that had no god, anywhere. There was no one except me and my misery. I don't think they realized that I just wanted someone to listen and understand, but it became clear that they did not understand, and they were not just there to listen, but gave me instructions (as if they knew) on how to get myself out of the hole. After that incident, I only had one goal in mind. Stay alive. Protect myself from myself, and just hold on.

    My sister too said almost the exact same thing. She said to forget it. It's the past, leave it there. I think I would have been able to take it better if she herself wasn't traumatized, but she was there and I'm positive that both of us went through the same hell. The only thing that I was able to do is accept it. This is where she was in her healing. And that I can only be there for her if or when she cracks.

    Here, in this community, you will be understood. It's really nice to finally have someone say, "It's ok to feel what you feel." We're glad to have you.
     
  11. wildfirewildone

    wildfirewildone Well-Known Member

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    Minister is copping out...

    I have a strong Faith but I do not believe that I just need to give everything to God so He can fix everything...There's the statement..."God helps those that help themselves"...my belief is that God provides support and knowledge..for we humans to be able to get through the crap in our lives...He is not going to do our WORK for us!!! What I "give to God" are the things like grudges..letting go of stressers..Have you ever read the serenity prayer??? A lot of things can be worked out ourselves....some can't then that is what I let go of...or try to at least....Try to find a good therapist and shrink....That'll help you do your WORK...we are all here to support you!!!!:smile: .....wildfirewildone....CREATING THE PEACE AND KEEPING IT
     
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