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General Can Combat Ptsd Be Triggered By An Argument???

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Why do you think that military training makes people more arrogant?
No, that's not what I said. I said the military training increased MY husband's arrogance. He was arrogant and add to that the self confidence they instill in the military along with the survival/fighting skills and it made him more arrogant. It doesn't affect everyone the same. For example if someone had no confidence and were not arrogant, they went through military training, they may come out with improved and enhanced self esteem.
 
@I'll make tea

I am not sure about combat part but I can only relate with argument can be trigger.

I would like to share with you about this part - I do have PTSD based on my experiences not related with combat.

I don't like to be in argument because it scared me and whenever I stand up or share my thoughts, I would get hurt or push down like thinks I'm wrong.

Yes, I got into argument lot with certain people and how I response is depend on how another person reacts.
 
@PureDogs What would you wish how people would react?

I do tell him I really appreciate his opinion and want him to give honest answers instead of agreeing with everything.
 
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My hubby only sometimes understand that he acts OCD'ish. He sometimes says "Okay, I might be a little OCD" and sometimes he considers everybody else to be chaotic, unclean, not on time... he is never on time when he does not want to do something but when he does want to do something he is always. When someone comes two minutes too late it stresses him big time. He says "Oh, people are so dirty, I would be ashamed to be on the streets wearing dirty shoes like that / trousers like this".

He also feels he needs to clean, polish and order everything in the evening because otherwise he is too stressed to sleep. Nowadays the coffee maker is his favourite nitpick, he feels it must be cleaned all the time. It's hard to clean and complicated.
 
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he is never on time when he does not want to do something but when he does want to do something he is always.
He is, for example, never late... but when he does not want to do something then he is late, he "forgets" about things and so on.
Well this kind of behaviour belongs, from my experience with my ex, rather to the passive-aggressive section, for he did quite the same as you mention.
 
@I'll make tea

What would you wish how people would react? - My answer is:-

"Respect my perspective and accept what I have learn from my experiences. Whenever I express my feeling, I would wish that person would actually listen, understand, and feel empathy without judgement then get in my "world" to understand me better. I get irritate when someone would say "Oh, that's in past, get over with it" That's not the point - I do know that it is in the past but it is not my fault.

Sometimes I get in argument with the person how I feel when the person unknowingly put trigger that brings me flashback and doesn't understand."

Does that answer your question - if not, I can expand more deeper. :)
 
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Do a quick internet search of the Thomas-kilmann conflict model, essentially there are 5 different esponses when faced with 'conflict' (am argument or such).
1. Accommodating
2. Avoiding
3. Collaborating
4. Competing
5. Compromising

An individual will have one of these as their 'base stance' as it were, so I will at all costs try to avoid a conflict, this is what it sounds like your husband is doing partially as well (although I'm not exactly an expert on the matter, it is something we have covered briefly at uni). I wouldn't be surprised if him having combat PTSD might exahsberate the issue, or indeed if people with PTSD are more likely to go to an avoidance response it's not something I have looked into. It's something you're welcome to look into :) (it may or may not be helpful)

The best advice I have is to stop trying to decide and label what is because of PTSD and what isn't.... learn about your husband and the illness and encourage him to share so that you can understand more of what you are dealing with.

I was about to type this, then realised it has already been said!

Good luck x
 
Does that answer your question - if not, I can expand more deeper. :)

Only partially. You are talking about the times you have an argument about one of the PTSD related behaviour of yours. I was also talking about "normal" arguments.

The last argument we had for example was about fixing the roof. My husband wanted to do it himself and I was opposed to it, because it is too dangerous to my mind and calling a roofer is not that expensive.... told him... my husband listened and said "Yes", "I see", "Yes", "I see your point" and only much later he said "Please let me say something. May I suggest I do it?"... and said that it was no dangerous at all and roofers take a lot of money.

I do not understand it, because why always agree first and say "Yes" and "I agree" if he does not agree at all and I never said he was not allowed to say or suggest something?
 
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When you are in a relationship with a sufferer, you have to learn not to argue. You have to learn to discuss. It is a hard habit to break. This is especially true when you don't feel like you are "arguing", but your sufferer feels like you are being too confrontational or aggressive.

I think he feels like it but I am not being confrontonial. I do not know what to do.

My husband thinks we agrue a lot when I think we don't. He does not like it when people have different opinions on anything - for example a music, a book, a political party - and either agrees with me tries to recruit me to his point.
I can only explain it like this: He seems to think that there is a right and a wrong opinion and if one of us is right that other must be tragically wrong.
 
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Could it be that "Yes", in that context was not him agreeing with you, it was him being supportive, acknowledging your point of view, and encouraging you to continue having your say? I ASK, because I can see myself saying pretty much the same things, in that situation, for the reasons I just gave.
 
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