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General Can't Cope

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Hopeless101

New Here
Hi, I'm new and so glad to have found this site. My husband has just started getting help and things have got so bad that I felt I had to leave our home. I have read some posts about how other wives have supported their spouses but I am so sorry but I just can't anymore. It got to the stage were I was having panic attacks at the thought of going home. The anger, the walking on eggshells, trying to predict and eliminate triggers, the control and mind games have finally taken their toll after 6 years. Please tell me I am not the only person on the face of the earth who can't cope? I feel like an awful person but my sanity was really at stake, I have recently felt as if life just wasn't worth living. I know he is sick but ......
 
Welcome to the site, I can understand your feelings, have you ever considered both of you going to see a therapist?

I know exactly what you mean, about the panic attacks when going home, I had that when my late wife's youngest son came to live with us.

He put us through Hell in his efforts to break us up, I was at breaking point, the thought of going home used to make me cringe?

You say that your husband has just started to get help, give things a chance, you never know, things could change as he makes progress with his therapy. It's always worth another try, good luck.
 
Your feelings are just as valid as his, even if you are the healthy one. Untreated PTSD is horrid to live with.

Nobody wants to say it, but I'd bet my bottom dollar most supporters have times when they're over the whole thing. Being the target, bearing the brunt of all the symptoms, not feeling loved, worrying about which way the wind is blowing everyday... Yes, we are lucky that we don't have PTSD or trauma, but we are totally on the outside with no control. It's like standing with your foot on a land mine and being afraid to step off it.

You're not the only one, not by a long shot.
 
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