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Depressed After Exposure Therapy And Emdr

Discussion in 'Depression & Suicidal Ideation' started by change, Jan 14, 2014.

  1. change

    change Well-Known Member

    My purpose in writing is to merely vent.

    I feel broken after my third attempt doing both Exposure Therapy with EFT, and EMDR with EFT. Never more! I am way to ??? for those approaches. They crack my psyche, leaving me disturbingly depressed.

    The morning after the session, I woke up somewhat depressed. Then work stress put me over the top, dropping me into a deeper depression, afterwards.

    A couple of friends helped me release my tearful distress and ground.

    Why did I try a version of it again? I thought EFT would help me ground and integrate after the exposure therapy and EMDR. No cigar.

    Back to the things that work for me.
    Abstract likes this.
  2. franciemarnie

    franciemarnie VIP Member Premium Member

    I'm sorry @change. I never tried these so I have no experience, but I do take risks to heal. Sometimes they work, sometimes not. How do we know until we try.

    I am so glad you took steps later to take care of yourself and you had friends that helped.
    ill and Abstract like this.
  3. macca

    macca Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear that you had such a hard time. I am so glad that you had friends you could turn to. I guess not everything works for everyone - but it was worth a try.
    change, ill and Abstract like this.
  4. Abstract

    Abstract VIP Member Premium Member

    Sorry to hear this @change. I hope you feel more grounded and uplifted soon. From reading it seems you are not alone and that it doesn't work for some people and can even leave them very destabilised after. Does it feel like too much came up at once and your usual filter was taken away? To me it almost sounds like that is what happens for people sometimes.

    You sound like you have found many things that are very helpful for you and have done wonderful work in the past. Take care.
    ill, change and macca like this.
  5. change

    change Well-Known Member

    @Abstract, @franciemarnie, & @macca: your compassion helped me release a tears of pain. A much appreciated healing medicine.

    Yes, in short, (thanks for the words) theses current therapies destabilize me and take away my filter. My big learning: I do much better in styles where I can and am prompted, to have a response/defend, after connecting to the feelings of the event-like in Voice Therapy (yell back) or self-defense/model mugging ( get to fight back), due to such early abuse.

    Additionally, if specific phrases from trauma events are used, they need to come out of my mouth (Voice Therapy), rather than a therapist's (like in the version of Exposure Therapy I tried.) Whew, what a nightmare!

    Years past, through a relaxation technique I revisited events, followed with supportive imagery. It was also challenging, and maybe just as bad; still felt very depressed and desperate-lay frozen afterwards. Even then, I needed more stabilizing than the therapist could offer. Everyone is different, and has different tolerances and needs.

    So glad to more clearly see the rendition of the above exposure therapies that work and don't work. So glad to have your support and have you be a part of my recovery team.

    Taking homeopathic for trauma, this am, to help my recovery.
    I'll get to do a bit of model mugging practice tonight, to help me land on my feet, literally.

    Now, off to work. Catch you later, my friends!:hug:
    Last edited: Jan 14, 2014
    macca and Abstract like this.
  6. Abstract

    Abstract VIP Member Premium Member

    You are very welcome @change. You have a lot of wisdom about what helps you and what you say makes perfect sense to me. Feel better soon.
    macca and change like this.
  7. change

    change Well-Known Member

    Thought I'd stay in touch for my sake. Just coming up for air, after two to three days down deep-laying low, getting through mild work days, and healing.

    I was able to do things that help me associate: fighting back physically-Model Mugging exercises, fighting back verbally, Voice Therapy exercises, and using Alexander Technique-to help release tension.

    I'm still in the process of 'coming back'. I growing out of the numb and empty space. Yuck. Ill give myself good sensory experiences today, as a goal. Off to work.
    macca and Abstract like this.
  8. Abstract

    Abstract VIP Member Premium Member

    Well done for using what works for you Change. I hope the coming back process completes soon. Working whilst in these states is so hard.
    change likes this.
  9. Hashi

    Hashi VIP Member

    change, EMDR and EFT aren't for me either. They only disrupt my system's own healing process. My system fought them so strongly EFT couldn't take any hold at all. EMDR was a more worrying experience, because it's stronger and could have maybe overcome the resistance if I'd continued.

    I only have that awareness because of doing craniosacral therapy, Focussing and work with the felt sense. I worry that there might be a lot of people having EMDR when it isn't right for them but they don't have a way of knowing that, so they think the after effects are an inevitable part of trauma work. I think there are cases when EMDR is helpful for someone, but not nearly as much as is currently practised. I think current widespread use of EMDR is a serious medical mistake, and that will be realised in 10 or 20 years' time. I hate seeing it happen before my eyes.

    Direct exposure therapy is also a complete no for me. Nearly all the exposure work I've done, ie consciously working on trauma experiences, has been through the starting point of art or dreamwork.

    Mistakes like this are hard. I hope you feel better soon.
    change likes this.

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