• 💖 [Donate To Keep MyPTSD Online] 💖 Every contribution, no matter how small, fuels our mission and helps us continue to provide peer-to-peer services. Your generosity keeps us independent and available freely to the world. MyPTSD closes if we can't reach our annual goal.

DID Did roll call?

Status
Not open for further replies.
We've kinda disappeared since we were diagnosed as DID. Hard to talk about it and lots of emotions and mostly not sure if we are understood here at all.

Also, people have shifted a lot since we joined a few years back. Can we do a roll call of the people with DID? Only if you want to identify yourself, of course. It's sometimes helpful to know who is also struggling with the same stuff, and maybe this is helpful to others too?

I'd like to get more active on here once again. In a way, I feel like this is a re-introduction to myself. So, hello everyone.
 
Hey there. :-) I was diagnosed a long time ago and am mostly functional in terms of the DID right now (we haven't integrated and there is no plan to), but have been through a *lot* and still have occasional issues. Although I'm mostly struggling with the PTSD and depression stuff right now, I'd love to talk and share what I've learned, and also share like struggles.
 
@whiteraven that's great that you are mostly functional! That is someth...

Integration is actually only the goal of *some* types of therapy. Traditional therapies for those with DID, for sure, but again, not all therapies. We took back that decision for ourselves. We were in a traditional type therapy which was incredibly destabilizing for us. We weren't getting better. Everything was just more and more chaotic for us. Our therapist kept saying that this was how it was supposed to be. That things would get worse before they got better. But we couldn't function in daily life, not like that. And once we moved on, finally, and were with someone new, in a different sort of therapy, learning functionality instead of being consistently dumped into past memories, we realized that, for us, this was the answer. Our previous therapist *literally* bullied us by saying over and over again that we would never be healed if we didn't fully process our memories. My insiders weren't willing to talk to him about a lot of things and I didn't remember much at all. And actually, looking back, I felt much worse in that therapy than I did out of it. But learning to work together, to develop communication and cooperation was something we absolutely could do and did, very effectively.

What I came to understand is that "healing" takes a great many forms and that we are really the only ones who can determine what is and feels right for us.

Now, I still have minor triggers that I struggle with, but nowhere near what I was dealing with a few years ago. My depression comes from my job choice and a spiritual struggle, which I am working on right now - they also have roots in childhood, but they are *my* issues and not my insiders. We, as a whole, are mostly at peace right now. Others still take their time out and do things they enjoy, they still have their upsets, but we function more like a family than like a warring kingdom. :-)
 
Thank you for this. Super helpful. I still have no idea what our goals are for therapy, bu...
My therapist said that our goal is not to get rid of any of my parts, but to be able to bring them from the past to the present . Once we are able to get to know all of my parts and their function and they understanding that the Abuse is not happening now, I will be able to pull each part as I need them. They just don't understand that time has changed and those people that were abusing me are no longer here.
 
I had spontaneous integration after remembering I had a different father. All I can figure out is that I no longer needed to have alters in order to protect myself from the truth? That's my best guess. It took about six months for a complete integration. Before integration I had over 75 alters. When I told that to my newest T her jaw dropped wide open. She immediately wanted to see my alter list. That's going to happen this coming week.

I opened my journal and looked at the names. They felt so foreign to me; as if, was that me? The only group of alters which wasn't so distant was my number one control group which protected the original me. I use some of their names still as pen names for writing.

There are sites which are supportive for DID and the abuse which caused it. I used to participate on one quite often.
 
I had a spontaneous integration 3 years ago, went into denial that I was just crazy, started with previous therapist for depression related to other mental disorders, started "trauma therapy" one year later, about six months ago, after a PTSD trigger, everyone exploded out like never before, completely self destructive and suicidal and with no support, ended therapy with that therapist.

As long as I keep myself mostly secluded and away from stressful enviornments we're able to maintain co-consciousness. New therapist is great and is helping us feel comfortable in sharing more of ourselves.

Learning everything from the beginning again, reconnecting with past alters/parts now, getting memories back.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top