D
Deleted member 28862
I've been on this site for about 3 years now, I've poured all my emotions, worries and frustrations to everyone in hopes that I will find some answers. Once again I'm back in an emotionally unstable mindset filled with questions and now answers.
Throughout my life I've been used and abused by majority of the men in my life, be it family, friends of the family or "friends" that I've made on my own, when all is said and done I just end up being used by everyone.
So when a person comes along, no matter how much they say and try to prove they're trustworthy, I just cannot bring myself to do it. Every year poses new challenges and struggles but every year certain struggles are never dealt with or fixed to the point where i'm not bothered by them anymore so in the long run they just build up and trickle over into the new year. With that being said, because of my sexual, mental and emotional abuse I've endured by the men around me for more than half my life (i'm only 22) it goes without saying that I have majors issues in trusting the men.
It's to the point where I have a phobia of men and I kina loathe being alone with one, even if I know in my heart that person wouldn't hurt me it doesn't stop me from being afraid of what they can do. Psychologically that how i think of men, as very frightening, animalistic beasts. As much as I don't want to... that how I see men. Obviously I know its wrong, I know its not right to have those thoughts of all men because of what a handful of moron's did to me but I'm just not able to think of them in any other way. Which brings me to the relationship part of my thread.
I now have someone new in my life, and to be completely honest, he can be scientifically proven as the safest man on earth for all women to be around, I fear that I will never completely trust him. As much as I want to talk about this with people I'm very close to, I can't bring myself to do so because they have proven over and over again that they're either uninterested in that part of my life and don't really care or they don't truly believe the level on intensity my trauma was/is.
So exactly what or how should I approach this situation with him, I've told him my biggest fear is him turning out to be complete sh*t like everyone else but its really having a good relationship with him and years into marriage or something, i still don't trust him.
Throughout my life I've been used and abused by majority of the men in my life, be it family, friends of the family or "friends" that I've made on my own, when all is said and done I just end up being used by everyone.
So when a person comes along, no matter how much they say and try to prove they're trustworthy, I just cannot bring myself to do it. Every year poses new challenges and struggles but every year certain struggles are never dealt with or fixed to the point where i'm not bothered by them anymore so in the long run they just build up and trickle over into the new year. With that being said, because of my sexual, mental and emotional abuse I've endured by the men around me for more than half my life (i'm only 22) it goes without saying that I have majors issues in trusting the men.
It's to the point where I have a phobia of men and I kina loathe being alone with one, even if I know in my heart that person wouldn't hurt me it doesn't stop me from being afraid of what they can do. Psychologically that how i think of men, as very frightening, animalistic beasts. As much as I don't want to... that how I see men. Obviously I know its wrong, I know its not right to have those thoughts of all men because of what a handful of moron's did to me but I'm just not able to think of them in any other way. Which brings me to the relationship part of my thread.
I now have someone new in my life, and to be completely honest, he can be scientifically proven as the safest man on earth for all women to be around, I fear that I will never completely trust him. As much as I want to talk about this with people I'm very close to, I can't bring myself to do so because they have proven over and over again that they're either uninterested in that part of my life and don't really care or they don't truly believe the level on intensity my trauma was/is.
So exactly what or how should I approach this situation with him, I've told him my biggest fear is him turning out to be complete sh*t like everyone else but its really having a good relationship with him and years into marriage or something, i still don't trust him.