trying2movefwd
MyPTSD Pro
Some of my support system really believes I need to go on disability. How do I know I need to? Like I haven't been able to keep a job, usually mental health interferes, but I am Okay (50 Percent of the time) at home with self care and house keeping duties (as well as the mom stuff), but when i work this goes to the way side. Am I lazy? Why cant I handle both ? Its like it creates too much stress, my anxiety heightens, i cant take it...and end up in a hospital for S/I. Its so stupid of me. I dont know what my problem is. If I can handle my home, mothering, and making it to mental health appointments, shouldnt i be able to handle working? Ugg...okay I am not even working right now and stress still spins me into a deeper depression and often leads to S/I or SH. My mood and emotions jump around significantly throughout the day. If I dont work people will judge me. If I loose my kudos and lose yet another job, I easily get to the point of hopelessness. Its like a no win situation. (I serously think I am borderline sometimes...I know I have traits..cuts me to the core)