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Do you share everything with your t or are you selectively candid?

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Do you just share what’s relevant (like what YOU want to work on) or do you open up about everything that’s vulnerable, even if you know why you have specific issues and don’t need to figure it out more? I mean, does anyone actually share EVERYTHING with another person? Aren’t we all selective in what we open up about?

After emailing my t about vulnerability I’m just wondering what to share now. I opened up about every topic to my last t, sans every timy detail, just the gist and I know why I am the way I am about things. And that didn’t help me. So do you just open up about things you think your t can help with?
 
For me I'm so far beyond talking about "the traumas" with her, they're there, she knows what they are and nothing is off limits so if something I'm talking about relates to X she knows it's ok to go there. I don't need to tell every single detail for her to get how I'm impacted.

I am working on the stuff I struggle with as a result - how I view myself, what that means in relationships, how I cope with triggers etc. That stuff is very hard and leaves me feeling very exposed at times. Yes time limits make me really think through what I'm taking but once I'm there nothing is really off limits if it's relevant or comes up in session.
 
I flat out lie to a counselor who wants to ask questions that I don't feel are relevant or appropriate. I feel as though I've made good progress on this healing journey and I'm not about to let someone derail it, or to form an uninformed opinion about me based on answers to questions that I don't care to provide answers for.

Do I recommend others lie? O heck no, I don't. My lies (of omission) are because I'm doing tons better, thank you very much, and doing tons better gives me options. When I wasn't doing well at all, lying would have been counter-productive and would have gotten in the way of helping to identify what was going on. Now I recognize what a flashback is, and what an increase of recurring memory fragments indicate, and what responses are effective for moving forward, etc. So I feel that I can say what I want to say in order to move the counseling in directions that will benefit me more than satisfy the therapist. Sounds pretty snotty, I know. But I'll be damned if I'm gonna play into the illness model of "healthcare." I'm investing in wellness, and I'm the biggest stakeholder in the deal.
 
Ya I don't think it's even possible to share everything, there is a lot of mundane details in our everyday lives it would take a lifetime to tell someone.... that being said, I usually have notes, so I go with whats on notes... but we don't spend a ton of time on any one thing.... go back and forth. If something becomes super important, then we will spend more time on that, otherwise, basically whatever I feel up for that day, and a lot of general chatter too
 
Sometimes I go in with notes, or if I emailed her a bunch on a tough week, we talk about that. There are some things that I know that I need her help with, but am not ready to tell her. I drop hints and we talk around the subject. Sometimes I think I am testing the waters on what her reaction might be. When we do emdr trauma work, I definitely do not tell her everything. My suds is usually too high to be able to speak about it, but when we work through the process, sometimes I do say more.
 
I think a better course of action would be to answer assertively that you do not wish to discuss that topic.
And that's a fine response, too, if it works better for someone. For me, I don't want the topic on the other person's radar. Example: Have you been sexually molested? I'd rather the counselor's notes say "client denies having had xxx experience" than "client does not wish to discuss experience with xxx."
 
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