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Do You Wake Up Angry?

Discussion in 'Discussion' started by pandora, Sep 7, 2008.

  1. pandora

    pandora VIP Member

    I don't know if this is common to anyone else and I am trying hard to rectify this but it is almost uncontrollable. When i wake up...I FEEL angry and then I tend to flip out over the smallest thing. I then about 5 minutes later will be apologizing like crazy to my son for yelling as I have taught him that yelling is inappropriate and here I am doing it. At least now...he really just brushes off things...I don't say nasty things but I raise my voice. Then I usually end up crying....I don't want this to affect him, i think that my openness and ability to explain things really helps...I just don't want to damage my son in any way. I have not been nightmaring and a lot of my traumas, I have worked hard on. I just can't seem to shake this nor do I know how to fix it.


    Does anyone else have this problem and what do you do?

    I think it may also be do to the fact that I never get three to four hours of sleep straight without waking up, getting up etc so I am never getting a rested sleep. Insomnia has always been a terrible aspect to PTSD that I can't overcome. At one time I was afraid to sleep as I did not want to nightmare, now I feel afraid of what tomorrow is going to bring and then I don't want to sleep because tomorrow will come sooner...crazy thoughts...UUUGGGHHHH!!!!!!!
  2. She Cat

    She Cat VIP Member

    I used to be a bear pretty much 24/7 , but mornings were the worst for me. I used to tell people yrs ago, DON'T talk to me before I have had 1/2 pot of coffee, and a pack of cigarettes.

    hmmmmmm, I don't smoke anymore, and I gave up coffee. My mood had improved greatly....:rolleyes:

    I think as time goes on, you go through more therapy, get a better handle on your PTSD, that your mood will improve.
  3. FlameTachiku

    FlameTachiku New Member

    Pandora,

    This has happened to me, also. It is shocking to my system as I have been someone who wakes up happy most of my life. I have learned this changes when PTSD is most severe combined with the symptoms of back pain, headaches, and lack of sleep. Fortunately this has not occured many times while I have been a mother. A quote from my son "you were scarey". That says a lot because I am very committed to being a good mom. I try to not make my pain his pain but those morning moments before the mind kicks in--oh no.

    I had to explain in childs terms that I was not well but that I would get better. That it is in his interest not to wake me unless it is important. It would not always be that way but for the time that is the very best I could do. He had to be a participant in surviveing or a victim without understanding. It is not a good position to be in for anyone. But for those moments when the mind does not rule then we do what we can to prepare those we love. I SO WISH that was NOT MY REALITY.

    Today I am in a period that I wake up cheerful, have fun, love work and family. PTSD is not ruleing my life. But I know it is not gone it will come again. I try to make plans for support and problem solve behaviors that will erupt again, during good periods. PTSD sucks. But we and our children can still have good lives. I have to tell myself this a lot when I am not suffering.
    Program-life is good, life is worth while, it is ok, it is worth doing, happiness at times make it worthwhile---do you ever feel that way?

    Best to you,

    Flame
  4. SweetpinNH

    SweetpinNH New Member

    I do have mornings when I wake up angry. Usually it's because I've had dreams where I have been angry at someone in the dream. I've learned to stay quiet on those mornings until the anger passes.
  5. becvan

    becvan Queen of the Blunt!

  6. pandora

    pandora VIP Member

    Yep..totally forgot....
  7. becvan

    becvan Queen of the Blunt!

    :wink: I kinda figured.. us and our memory issues you know! :crazy:

    bec
  8. pandora

    pandora VIP Member

    As a good friend used to say to me..."Of all of the things that I have lost, I miss my mind the most!".......I was more optomistic my last thread about the same subject...Oh the joys of PTSD. The constant mood swings are enough to make me feel like I am actually losing it or have already lost it...ha ha.
  9. 2quilt

    2quilt New Member

    Thanks Bec

    Whew! I thought I recognised that subject line, and I thought I was having a "senior moment" and I am not even a senior.

    2quilt (checking the mirror or grey hairs)
  10. rmf3175

    rmf3175 New Member

    Ya, I pretty much always wake up fighting in the middle of a nightmare. Very angry, and agressive. The safest thing to do to wake me up is stand at a distance with a long branch and poke me with it.:poke::thumbs-up

    Here is one of my favorite quotes:

    The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all it's contents. Someday the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation, or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new dark age.

    H.P. Lovecraft
  11. Mel911

    Mel911 New Member

    Hi! Your not alone. I also wake up angry and it is usually after a night of 45 minutes sleep to only a couple hours of off and on sleep. I realize, now, that my anger comes not from the lack of sleep but the lack of quality sleep. Most of all the time I spend sleeping, I have nighmares, this causes me to be angry and short tempered when I get up in the morning. The first little thing sets me off. My friends use to joke and say "don't talk to her before her first cup of coffee" but now we know it's really from the PTSD and not the lack of coffee in the morning. I've really had to make a conscious effort to try to control my temper in the morning. I've found that I can handle mornings much better if I have a set routine and I follow it. I don't know if the routine would work for you but it has for me. My treatment has also made huge impovements in helping me with my mornings and I stopped drinking coffee.

    I know it's hard and sometimes the anger just wells up really quickly over something really small but you can get through it. Just explain to the people around you and when you start feeling it well up inside, try letting them know what you are feeling before you loose it. I know it's hard, I'm doing my best to get through it too.

    Hang in there, the road is ugly but it does get better.
  12. sirsir

    sirsir New Member

    After some thought I do wake up angry. However I just keep quiet and stomp around as if I need My first cup of coffee(but I don't drink coffee). If I am touched while sleeping I wake up swinging. Thankfully I have never hit the wife , but she is very careful how she wakes me. We are short(I'm 5' 8" and she is 5' 6") and I have a king size bed.
  13. ladybug08

    ladybug08 New Member

    I, too use to wake up angry. Not due to lack of sleep, but the quality of sleep. I use to have nightmares often, now since starting therapy, my nightmares are less and less. My son even told me that I am in a better mood when I wake up...not mad.
  14. uplate

    uplate New Member

    Oh yeah, in my case the alarm clock was the end of a broomstick and a friend with a very concerned look on her face. I said I wasn't that bad but looking at it I was, she told me what I was like, I became more aware of it especially looking at the state of my bed, a foot off the wall (it's not on wheels), bits of it all over the place, not the peaceful sleep I'd thought I had even though I couldn't remember what I dreamt. It explains a few of the strange early morning reactions I've got from boyfriends over the years, maybe they were too scared to tell me I was a monster-not-a-morning-person or what did I do last night to deserve a knee. It improved as I did. I had a cockatoo a few years ago, he was pretty tame (and spoilt) I used to leave his cage open when I was home and he'd jump out in the morning, come running into my room and screach as if to say good morning it's great to be alive! That would wake me up and strangely I didn't feel the urge to screach back, still have midnight bedding redecorating though, one night I woke up in different pajamas, I'd got up during the night and changed, scared the crap out of me, god knows how long that took me, the state of my wardrobe half the time I can't find what I'm looking for when I'm awake.

    I think that would be something like seeing yourself on TV, I'm a glutton for punishment so did the TV show dogs body thing once (daggy I know but hey it was a paying gig :)), 40 mins live on air, 40 mins of sheer terror and then OMG I don't really look like that do I? Oh crap, how many people were watching? The worst panic attack I can ever remember having, talk about red light fever. Seriously though the memories are like that for me, too much to take in all at once so they get released in managable portions.
  15. shari

    shari New Member

    Starting to feel like a drug pusher. Have you tried Prazosin? It is actually a blood pressure medication that has been very successful in treating combat vets for nightmares at night and sleep disturbance.
    I started using it in June and it is my new BFF.
    I wake up much more rested and peaceful. Worth a try since it is not addictive, not an SSRi and very inexpensive.
  16. midi

    midi New Member

    Yep, I'm normal! Waking up an angry monster, spewing some crap, like a tornado, and then it's gone... I do that several times a week. I also do it every single time I get home from groceries or the movies or an event - I can't seem to make the transition from one state of being to another...
  17. Anonymoose

    Anonymoose New Member

    Yeah. And spent the day with flooding that made me even angrier. I haven't found a thing that helps. I usually choose pleasant distractions then but nothing makes it go away. It just does, sooner or later. I remind myself of that when I can't stand it and can't escape it.

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