Really. I've never had one. Had lots of sex, but never a relationship of any kind. I don't even know who I am most of the time. I've never really ever let anyone in, not that any have wanted me. My trust sucks totally. I've been hurt by a lot of people in life besides my rapists, too. I'm 44.
Am I really missing much? It just seems there are so many selfish people, and all the good ones are married, I wonder if I'm missing anything. Most of the ones I've know in a relationship were unhappy. Maybe only 1 in 10 were happy. I ain't kidding. I'd love to find someone to love and love me (no clue what love is but I wonder if romantic love exists--some don't think it does--I've never had it at all), but, I'm 44 and really wonder if it has past me by.
I know having kids has past me by. I don't want a teen when I'm 65/66 or later. Sexually, I can find NSA stuff willingly every night if I'd want it. LOL I still want a wife deep down somewhere, but have to ask that question. My belief there is romantic love has been shaken to my core recently and I'm beginning to believe, like some, that is really doesn't exist at all. Google: "does romantic love exist?" and you'll be shocked how many says it doesn't. In fact, forget that previous question and answer this:
Does romantic love even exist? Am I wasting my time looking for something that doesn't really happen? If you found it, what does it really feel like?
Am I really missing much? It just seems there are so many selfish people, and all the good ones are married, I wonder if I'm missing anything. Most of the ones I've know in a relationship were unhappy. Maybe only 1 in 10 were happy. I ain't kidding. I'd love to find someone to love and love me (no clue what love is but I wonder if romantic love exists--some don't think it does--I've never had it at all), but, I'm 44 and really wonder if it has past me by.
I know having kids has past me by. I don't want a teen when I'm 65/66 or later. Sexually, I can find NSA stuff willingly every night if I'd want it. LOL I still want a wife deep down somewhere, but have to ask that question. My belief there is romantic love has been shaken to my core recently and I'm beginning to believe, like some, that is really doesn't exist at all. Google: "does romantic love exist?" and you'll be shocked how many says it doesn't. In fact, forget that previous question and answer this:
Does romantic love even exist? Am I wasting my time looking for something that doesn't really happen? If you found it, what does it really feel like?