SeekingAfrica
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I feel like I've had such a hard bout of dealing with everything for half a year, and the year before that was really hard too...And the last weeks are hell. And some nights I feel so down, and scroll through facebook or instagram feeds aimlessly and everyone looks so happy and accomplished. And I feel so lost and feeling it hard to get through each day and haven't worked on my real goals more than trying to survive for so long that it just HURTS. And I know those are people that love me and I still doubt everything and everyone somehow. And feel excluded.
And I know, I know this is really unbecoming of me.
I know this isn't how I logically feel.
I know that social media feeds aren't realistic- even mine looks colorful and happy. I mean I post rarely and I haven't posted in a month...but what is already there is happy and makes me seem like interesting person. Which I can be in a normal state.
I know all this.
I know the grass isn't greener.
And still, I have those moments sometimes.
May be I'm in so much pain that it's easier to be concentrated on other people too.
I just wonder if I'm the only one doing this. I kind of think everyone on occasion gets in a bout of social media jealousy sometimes. Though I can be completely wrong and all this can sounds awful, of course...Ugh....as I said, very unbecoming, I'm usually the least jealous person too, this makes me feel very uncomfortable...
And I know, I know this is really unbecoming of me.
I know this isn't how I logically feel.
I know that social media feeds aren't realistic- even mine looks colorful and happy. I mean I post rarely and I haven't posted in a month...but what is already there is happy and makes me seem like interesting person. Which I can be in a normal state.
I know all this.
I know the grass isn't greener.
And still, I have those moments sometimes.
May be I'm in so much pain that it's easier to be concentrated on other people too.
I just wonder if I'm the only one doing this. I kind of think everyone on occasion gets in a bout of social media jealousy sometimes. Though I can be completely wrong and all this can sounds awful, of course...Ugh....as I said, very unbecoming, I'm usually the least jealous person too, this makes me feel very uncomfortable...