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Feeling alone

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Sargonnas

Learning
Today has been a testing day, the urge to create deep wounds is almost unbearable. The voices seams louder then normal and the anxiety has reached its boiling point. I tried make today normal for the sake of my family but found myself either looking at the ground or staring into the blue sky.
I feel so sad, I feel so alone even tho I have loved ones around. I want to cry, I want to fight, I want pain so that I don't have to face what is really going on.
My meds just make me feel crazier.
Its just been a blue day :(
 
Hey Sarg-
A question from a person that has heen there so this is not rooting from judgement but from concern and experience-
What clicked with me was your u saying you either looking at the ground or looking at the sky... that to me says you need to ask for some personal time. Whether its go to the park and think, go to the gym and hit the bag hard, or talk to a group, therapist or I LOVE writing. Blow all that crap out on paper, you can even have a fire in an outdoor home firepit and throw it in after to really send it home healing wise. Listen to your body. Its talking to you. When tou tend to it, it will feel better. I know workng and parenting is challenging but try to find time. Its worth it!!!!
 
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