I'm way into a bubble and it's not even safe here. I don't even know why I'm posting. I'll see one of my doctors soon...maybe one of my pills is in the wrong dose and screwing up my mood. Nowhere, nothing, nobody feels safe so it feels impossible. I feel trapped by lots of circumstances and unwilling or unable to appreciate support or positive connections. Just irritable and like "get-the-F#(K-away-from-me" to the whole world. It all feels like a shit hole I was born into and hurting my body is a way to at least say I have some ownership of my space, even if I feel trapped. Images of destroying myself that I won't go into. But I won't hurt myself...I took a couple sleeping pills, will go to bed, and if I wake up spontaneously wanting to destroy myself I'll call the hospital or something. I don't know what happened to me.
I totally edited this but the old version shows up on the main page of the forum. Whatever. I don't care.
I totally edited this but the old version shows up on the main page of the forum. Whatever. I don't care.
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