Bananie
Confident
I was having a text conversation with someone. They mentioned authors that I mistook as musicians, since we were talking about musicians, so I said, oh, dur! And then, well, I don't read much anymore, but I may look them up! They replied, it's ok. I said, I know, but I wasn't looking at it as an assignment or anything, just a polite closer.
Then I thought, shit, should I have said that? Yes, this person seems to like when I overexplain things. Which brought be back to a convo with my T (like so many things do), T: "Since we can share humor with each other." Me "Yeah, thanks for that, I don't think this would work if you couldn't handle my humor." T Smirk "Not everyone's cup of tea?" Me: "No.....I can usually tailor it...." Dumbass, literally the number one thing I hear about myself is "You're so funny!!" Oh that was another convo, "I can probably answer these questions because of how I know you, but fill these out." Oh wait, that wasn't an out loud convo, that was just me sitting there after hearing that thinking "then why do I have to fill these out?" but now, thinking, wait, you know me? I don't even know me, what do you know that I don't know?
I started this diary thread because the thought just struck me that "I have no idea what is happening with me right now."
And now, I can't stop thinking "I should call T, leave a vm, ask what he meant by that, I don't need an answer til next time, but I might not have the courage to ask next time."
I definitely won't.
I can't even type all that's going through my head right now, and I want this saved, but like it's a diary right, so I can just add to it.....? How do I even fail at a forum?
Then I thought, shit, should I have said that? Yes, this person seems to like when I overexplain things. Which brought be back to a convo with my T (like so many things do), T: "Since we can share humor with each other." Me "Yeah, thanks for that, I don't think this would work if you couldn't handle my humor." T Smirk "Not everyone's cup of tea?" Me: "No.....I can usually tailor it...." Dumbass, literally the number one thing I hear about myself is "You're so funny!!" Oh that was another convo, "I can probably answer these questions because of how I know you, but fill these out." Oh wait, that wasn't an out loud convo, that was just me sitting there after hearing that thinking "then why do I have to fill these out?" but now, thinking, wait, you know me? I don't even know me, what do you know that I don't know?
I started this diary thread because the thought just struck me that "I have no idea what is happening with me right now."
And now, I can't stop thinking "I should call T, leave a vm, ask what he meant by that, I don't need an answer til next time, but I might not have the courage to ask next time."
I definitely won't.
I can't even type all that's going through my head right now, and I want this saved, but like it's a diary right, so I can just add to it.....? How do I even fail at a forum?