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Childhood For Those Who Experienced Neglect And Abuse Growing Up: How Hard Was The Transition To Adulthood?

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its been pretty terrible "trying" to be an adult. Nothing has come naturally about it, i feel as hopeless and unprepared as a child would be trying to pretend to be an adult. I feel as if ive never grown up, although im responsible and most people would say very together - on the face of it maybe but emotionally i dont think ive matured much
 
@foreveralone2099 When I worked low pay jobs I got hit on a lot by predatory men who thought they could lure me with their wealth and it felt really gross and I had trouble dealing with it because I was always trying to be polite so they would often persist which made going to work feel hard.

Same here. I don't know why I felt like I had to be so polite and I don't think I realized how encouraging that was to them. I guess I had a lot of fear over upsetting men. I called some guy a creep the other day when he asked for my number even after I told him I was married so I guess I got over that.
 
Same here. I don't know why I felt like I had to be so polite and I don't think I realized how encouraging that was to them. I guess I had a lot of fear over upsetting men. I called some guy a creep the other day when he asked for my number even after I told him I was married so I guess I got over that.

i'm like really good at this anymore, you just have to humiliate them a lot? as time passed i got to enjoy it because it was such a wonderful opportunity to be such an awful troll.

i kind of regret how badly it's warped my relationships with men tho; put me in a room with nice, respectful guys and i'll still try to manipulate the shit out of them before i even know what i'm doing. my sexuality is totally damaged from all this tbh.
 
As soon as I was able, I got a job, within two weeks I had moved out of home, and for me the freedom was great, there was no one to physically hurt me.

it's great isn't it, everyone thinks i'm a bum but i don't give a f*ck cos it's like "hi guys i'm not sick in bed and dodging homocide attempts anymore".

bulletproof 4 lyf

sometimes i have to stop and pause with wonder over how lucky i am.
 
Being a teenager was hell for me as you start questioning whats right and whats wrong, and slowly it crept up on me that what my parents were doing was wrong. I spent most of my time figuring out how to stay out of the house, while balancing my sister who refused to leave the house and was very mentally unstable.

That being said, being an adult now is awesome (on the child abuse scale anyway). I never have to be scared of them again, I can call the police and get them arrested if they do anything. Thats kinda comforting to know.
 
That being said, being an adult now is awesome (on the child abuse scale anyway). I never have to be scared of them again, I can call the police and get them arrested if they do anything. Thats kinda comforting to know.

you're lucky to live in a country that has a functional police service. american police are tools of the 1% pretty much. no one ever gave a f*ck about all the shit my parents pulled with me, which really compounded the problem.
 
do you guys find it was harder to enter the adult world? do you wish you'd had parents who'd loved you?

Yes on both.

I grew up in a cult that was ran by my step father and mother. My dad left when I was 12 after missing a millon red flags and then took his 12 yr olds word for "leave me alone, I hate you and never want to see you". A phone call I was made to make because, I see now, my mom was at contempt of court to not allow me to see him.

I was split off from my family and the normal world. When I broke from them and got my own apartment, I honestly thought the world worked the way the cult did. I was 18 when I moved but they had control over me until I was 19. I am very thankful that I met some amazing people that really helped me in those years.

But yes, it was super difficult to learn the real world and how to be in it. I still struggle with that and I am now 36.
 
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