NewBeginnings
MyPTSD Pro
A common thread during therapy sessions is ongoing stressful situations and how I manage. I tend to do a lot around my house and with our family upkeep. My therapist keeps referring to my doing everything which I challenge. Anyway also work full time. My T references that “we” are not living in the 50’s and that in the 70’s woman worked hard to change the thinking that women do it all. She encourages me to communicate with my husband that he needs to contribute. I have a long list (like santa’s endless list) of why he isn’t able to make dinner or pick up after himself or not do something else. We discuss my feeling guilty for not being super woman. Anyway i asked if I really sounds like i could be living in the 50’s and her response was yes - without a doubt.
My T says it is not fair of me to not give him a chance to change? She says I can’t change people but he has no chance if i don’t tell him and give him an opportunity to change.
So i did an incredibly bold move and asked him to make dinner yesterday(his day off). He said no because he had errands to run. At the end of the day- i asked him what he did and he said “goofed off”. When i got home - he decided to go “do errands” and I made dinner. I have 3 kids and not making dinner results in no dinner being made so it is not an option.
To my point - I don’t want to be disappointed. If I didn’t ask I wouldn’t be disappointed by the answer. I am annoyed that I believed that asking would encourage a different response. I thought I was clear and simple about my request and it ended in my being disappointed that i thought it would be different. Frustrated!! What is the point? Should I have done it differently?
My T says it is not fair of me to not give him a chance to change? She says I can’t change people but he has no chance if i don’t tell him and give him an opportunity to change.
So i did an incredibly bold move and asked him to make dinner yesterday(his day off). He said no because he had errands to run. At the end of the day- i asked him what he did and he said “goofed off”. When i got home - he decided to go “do errands” and I made dinner. I have 3 kids and not making dinner results in no dinner being made so it is not an option.
To my point - I don’t want to be disappointed. If I didn’t ask I wouldn’t be disappointed by the answer. I am annoyed that I believed that asking would encourage a different response. I thought I was clear and simple about my request and it ended in my being disappointed that i thought it would be different. Frustrated!! What is the point? Should I have done it differently?