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Hello - Not Diagnosed and Not Sure About Telling Story

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nobody

Learning
hi. my name is brian. im 23 and from upstate new york. im not diagnosed but i dont think you could argue if i have it or not. im not sure if telling my story will do any good... i just dont know what to do anymore.
 
Hi Brian,

Welcome to the forum......I would suggest that if your not sure just yet, then just read for awhile....Then if you feel comfortable, let some out. No one here is going to push you into anything......

Wendy
 
well, it's not that it bothers me. I've just...said it so many times already. I feel different today. It was all so long ago but it all just seems to rule my life and control the person I grow to become. And yet I have things to be optomistic about, and at times I am... ahhhh its all so cliche' its almost putrid.
 
well... i mean, my childhood wasn't great. nothing really special about it. it wasnt exactly cruel. not to me, but thats why it was cruel. it all had nothing to do with me at all. when he hit her, it was because shes a very stubborn woman. thats just how my mom is and we all know alcohol doesnt help.

I just wish someone wouldve done something for me. Now I am older and I still feel like a child. I dont feel like a single day has passed. I still feel locked up in my own little world sometimes even though there is nothing particularly wrong. It makes me angry to know that there are other kids out there, like I was, who are being ignored because they dont understand what is going on and they dont know that they can fight back. There is no one out there to take your hand and show you the way when you are a child. That was my parents job but I never had any parents...
 
Hey Brian, welcome to the forum. Getting your story out is vital to you, but you have to be ready for it at the same time.
 
im not quite sure youre understanding me. I am 23. _twenty_three_

Its not like I havent told "my story" before. all I see here is a bunch of people telling stories and a bunch of responses like, "Oh, thats terrible." Well, yeah, I know it's terrible. I have head issues and they do not consist of stupidity. :dontknow:
 
Brian,

I'm 53 and I still tell my story. I don't consider myself stupid either.

I really think that before you judge......Look at your own issues. One being your apparent anger, and overwhelming need to be heard. Yeah I hear you loud and clear. Now please deal with your anger, in a more polite and controlled manner. There is an "Old saying....You get more with honey, than vinegar.

All of us here have problems that we are trying to deal with. We do it with compassion, and empathy, not anger and hostility.

Wendy
 
Hey Brian, if that is all you see then your obviously not looking at the bigger picture. If you have PTSD, you have head issues as you put it. No issues with that. To learn how to manage PTSD, you must first treat the source itself, being the trauma. Its not just about talking, its not just about "telling your story" as you put it, its about first getting your story on paper, then having a shitload of heads all looking in and providing the "bigger picture" to you that you cannot see for yourself. The bigger picture, the pieces you cannot understand or piece together, other will likely be able to help you achieve this, compared to say just one therapist who thinks they have all the answers.

No one person has all the answers, and I mean no one person. The more people can put something in front off, the better the chances you will find the answer your missing. Thats what a community is about, not just being warm and fuzzy trying to reassure one another. If you understood the bigger picture, then you wouldn't need help to heal in the first place, would you? We all need others eyes to find for us what we cannot find ourself, even though right in front of us, our own mind clouds our judgement.

Its just like when someone is ill, yet they can give rational advice to others, yet cannot receive their own advice because they are clouded by themselves. Talking helps a person move out of denial, the denial that they are as sick as the doctors and others know they are, yet often the sufferer doesn't believe themselves.

PTSD is a killer, and if you think its anything less, your already kidding yourself. PTSD takes lives daily, through suicide, heart attacks from the sheer stress placed upon the bodies organs, doing stupid high risk shit that one might not normally do, and the list just keeps going on.

You must first be out of denial, you must remove unnecessary self medication like alcohol or drugs (except prescribed medicines), you must heal your past trauma as that is the major cause for most of your current symptoms, then you must learn how to manage PTSD itself, your lifestyle as such, to actively engage and manage your present and future from that point forward. This is how a sufferer gets back into life without constant attack from PTSD and its symptoms.
 
Please read more, you don't just get "that's terrible", we normally get knocked here as that is not this forums MO. You need to tell your story so others can help you get down to the vast arrays of emotions that hold us back. To work through each one at a time and get a better understanding which leads to acceptance and healing. When we open up you have others like you at different stages of healing that can see things you may not yet. The longer you post you in turn can help other new people go through the walk you have already made healing.

Welcome to the forum.
 
And I will admit, Anthony is not always one to be bothered with being polite. We all try but we are not always. PTSD is serious and so are we. We are all very serious in getting down to healing, but won't argue with someone why they should. This place is busy and we will focus more on healing than niceness. Believe it or not it helps getting pussy footing out of the way. The perk here is also what some see as our downfall. But those who want to heal come back.
 
but what am I supposed to want? what do I seek? can you tell me? i dont know the answer so maybe you can answer that one for me. what am I supposed to be doing? what is normal? for me normal is being tired. for me normal is not having a family and living alone. for me normal is a scar. if I tell you what caused that scar, will my scar fade? and even if that happens, will people stop ignoring me in every way possible? When I sit with my "friends" or "family" and tell them about my social quirks and why I have them, will they suddenly stop doing those things? Will they realize and understand with the same compassion and empathy in this forum? No, they will not. Not only will they not do so, but they have not done so already--in past tense. The damage is already done. But what do I want? What am I supposed to want? I dont exist. I am neither dead nor alive. I simply do not exist...
 
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