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Hi I've Had Enough Of Being The Ill Chap - Pushbike Accident

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by kevin66, Feb 25, 2007.

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  1. kevin66

    kevin66 New Member

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    Hi all

    background

    August 5, 2004 I was cycling home from work when just round the corner from home a car suddenly veered across the road and into mypath. I thought I was going to get by but it kept coming and we collided (not quite head on).

    I landed on the pavement on my side of the road, possibly?? unconcious (according to witnesses I was but I'm not so sure).

    Paramedics came and then ambulance, I was released that night following checks.

    The rest of that week I felt strange in my head, very odd like detached. I know now that friends said I did not seem all there?

    One week later and a trip to the docs, that morning I could not stop wringing my hands, she asked me about the accident and I broke down. Generally down hill from there.

    Diazepam, Sertraline and then Carbamazapine.

    Incredible rage, suicidal thoughts, punching things to feel something real, unable to leave the house, incredible sleep problems, unable to hold a pen, muscle jerks, shaking.

    Psychiatric appointments and 18months attending a day hospital.

    All this over a lousey little bike accident.

    I've had pschological treatments and assistance including a little EMDR and I'm back at work after 2 years off, not doing what I used to but I'm there.

    Anyway I've had enough, I want out of the meds, out of the ptsd, out of the depression, fed up of being the ill chap and I want to feel like a proper person again.

    I plan to re-tell what happened to my wife every morning, I'm hoping that this will reduce the symptoms. I tried it this morning with the usual muscle jerks but I'm determined. Also want to start reducing the Meds. Yes I'm still depressed and irritable (shouting and very occaisional punching) but I need to do something I need to change.

    Hopefully I'll get some more EMDR, even though I hated it first time round.

    take care everyone.

    idiceus
     
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  3. anthony

    anthony Renovation Aficionado Founder

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    Idiceus, the most important thing is that you have accepted the problems, you are now proactive in finding solutions to them, which is the idea to heal in the first place. It takes time, but its achievable when no denial is present. Your on the right path... well done.
     
  4. cookie

    cookie I'm a VIP

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    welcome to the forum, ID
     
  5. YoungAndAngry

    YoungAndAngry Well-Known Member

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    Welcome to the forum idiceus :)
     
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