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Hi Out There! Slowly Things Come Together

Discussion in 'Supporter Discussion' started by dazednconfused, May 13, 2007.

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  1. dazednconfused

    dazednconfused Active Member

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    I have been off the forum for awhile and thought I would check back in. Not much has changed really other than they finally diagnosed my little boy with Asperger's syndrome and I feel like my husband most likely has the same problem, but they have him diagnosed with PTSD and OCD. I have read a lot of forums and things on this and a lot of people with Asperger's get diagnosed with the two above before they are diagnosed with adult Asperger's. I am just trying to be there for my husband when he wants me to, but it has gotten to the point that we just can't even talk.

    He still will not settle in the divorce and one minute he is wanting to talk to me and the next minute, he wants to push me away.

    I have finally told him and his family to just leave me alone. I have been through so much and right now I am just concentrating on taking care of my child.

    We have lots of fun together and his daddy comes and does things with him now more and so he is happier.

    Just thought I would say hello.

    Hope you all are doing well.

    God bless.

    Dazed
     
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  3. Jet

    Jet Well-Known Member

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    My Goddess Son also has Aspbergers. They are work but such beautiful little souls. How are the services where you are? Is your boy being provided with what he needs?

    I remember when Joe was diagnosed. It was insane. And then after his therapist dx'd him and he went to a specialist and they said the same thing we still had to get a dx from the school (before he could qualify for services through the district). He also has PTSD and they really wanted to put all of his problems off on the DV situation his mom had been in.

    It was better after his dx - before that it was like they refused to believe that there was anything going on with him at all. He was just a bad kid, always into some kind of trouble and always running away. At one point he kept getting into trouble during music class. The school said he was hiding and playing underneath the bleachers and also that his day was always really bad after (this was a big deal as he kept getting sent home). What they neglected to tell us was that he was hiding under the bleachers holding his hands over his ears and rocking back and forth (people with Aspberger's can have audio and visual sensitivities).

    It makes sense that the hubby might also have it. It is common for the parent or parents of an Aspbergers child to have it (often undiagnosed) or to have some of the traits. OCD is not uncommon and a lot of those traits match PTSD also.

    Anyway, enough of my babbling. Really I just started out to say hello.

    Blessings to you and your family,
    Jet
     
  4. dazednconfused

    dazednconfused Active Member

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    thanks for your hello

    Yes, my son has been labeled and I have been told to just "spank" him and he will put his hands over his head in certain situations and do like you said. His dad just does not want to accept all of this and he has left us back in September and I know the man actually loves us, but is acting so weird and just has the "don't care" attitude and he before they had him on Lexapro was not that way at all and was a totally devoted father and husband, so I am so at a loss to know what is going on with him, but with my child, we are going to go to camp this summer and he got a scholarship for this which helped me out as I am about tapped out for money until the divorce is settled and may lose everything I have. I have a lawyer, but he does not see much hope for some reason and I am about ready to switch lawyers, but I have already invested about all the money I have in this one, so really don't know what to do. My little boy is doing better on meds and if they would correctly diagnose my husband with adult asperger's and give him the correct meds, I believe he would be better off.

    Thanks for talking to me.

    God bless!

    dazed
     
  5. Jet

    Jet Well-Known Member

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    Did I read that correctly, someone told you to spank him? Was it a pro (if it was find a new one)?

    How old is your little guy? You said he was diagnosed, does he qualify for disability payments? What about services through the school district?

    A lot of questions I know. Sorry.

    Blessings,
    Jet
     
  6. dazednconfused

    dazednconfused Active Member

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    Hi

    That is what I have been told by other family members and I do believe in spankings, but only when necessary and my son was/is having problems related to the autism I believe and I don't always believe that spanking is the answer for a child that has trouble understanding things.

    dazed
     
  7. pandora

    pandora I'm a VIP

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    My son too has aspergers, he is 11 now. i beleive spanking would be the worst thing. i have found that time charts, really scheduled aspects of really most aspects of our lives, a timer is now my best friend........Pick your battles or you will be battling all day, being in a small group setting in school, with an EA has been wonderful. We still have good and bad days but it doesn't seem quite as frustrating. My son also has OCD, tourettes (or mild tics)anxiety and separation anxiety. Meds are also useful but it is something that I really had to accept, I am a registered nurse and one doctor said to me would you feel guilty giving him insulin for diabetes, or pain medication if he was huurting. So.We now take medication and it really has been helpful. he takes Adderoll and clonidine.
    Anyway, take care. i just thought I would share a bit.
    Take care.
     
  8. dazednconfused

    dazednconfused Active Member

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    Thanks

    I feel like I am going "nuts". My husband left in September and is acting weird. They say he has PTSD and OCD, but I really believe that he has Asperger's syndrome too. My in-laws do not understand about Asperger's and still maintain that a good "whipping" will get him into shape and act like I am not a good mama sometimes. I am working two jobs, because of going through the divorce and I am give out all the time. My husband is in la-la land and I do not know if he will ever be back to himself.

    My little boy on a brighter note is doing well, other than from the divorce and the in-laws and such, but he was just approved for the "gifted" program at school and he also got a scholarship to a camp for Asperger's this Summer, so maybe they can explain some new techniques and things like you mentioned to me. He takes Adderall, but not a mood stabilizer yet. I am so afraid of those, but he may need to eventually have one and they have mentioned Risperdal.

    I feel like my life is a nightmare. I never planned on being a single mama and I feel so upset all the time and just angry that all this has been dumped in my plate and I am just supposed to "deal with it" and "get over it". That is what I am constantly told, but I love my husband and we have been married almost 18 years now and I can't just "get over it" and especially with this new diagnosis for my son and all the other stuff going on.

    If you guys have any ideas for me, let me know and remember us in your prayers please.

    dazed
     
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