- Thread starter
- #25
I
Ireva
a tap on the hand with a firm "no, HOT, it will burn you!" Will suffice.
You 100% misunderstood what I said.
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a tap on the hand with a firm "no, HOT, it will burn you!" Will suffice.
my bad!:DYou 100% misunderstood what I said.
I am sure there are parents out there who can engage in "safe spanking". What does this mean? No objects? Open palm? Don't leave a mark? This happened to me and it was terrefying.
Okay, so.....a big part of abuse investigations is talking to the children. That helps frame things and we (most of the time) need some sort of outcry to move forward with an investigation anyway. Personally, IMO, "safe spanking" is a compromise. It is not against the law to spank your kids (within reason, within the guidelines I explained above), but if we just told parents that and left it at that? Hell no, that gray area leaves way too much room for interpretation. So, they developed "guidelines for safe spanking" to try and address that gray area. Is it a perfect system? NO. Do parents have the right to spank their kids? YES. Should they be doing so if it is "terrifying" or "traumatizing" to the child, as you said it was for you? NO. And, if I had a spanking/potential physical abuse case and talked to the kid and there were signs that they were terrified or traumatized due to the spanking? Then yeah, that's a problem and not your average, run of the mill spanking.I think "safe spanking" poses HUGE risks for it to turn into abuse. I think 'safe spanking' could actual count as psychological abuse. It is dehumanizing, shaming, and embarassing. Even if it follows the guidelines.
I really wish more people would read studies about physical abuse, instead of assuming and judging it as insignificant. S...
I also forgot to mention that it also affects looking for a job because employers expect employees to be confident, which...
It is not insignificant. And what do I need to read studies for? I worked in the system for years, dealing with child victims and perps on a daily basis, and studied both physical and sexual abuse in undergrad. There is no judgement from me here. And maybe my above comment: "I know that no good comes from comparing abuse, but honestly? I have a hard time getting worked up over spanking when I had toddlers with STDs from daddy or high school coaches coercing oral sex from students." comes off as insensitive, and for that I apologize, but this...I really wish more people would read studies about physical abuse, instead of assuming and judging it as insignificant.
is not spanking. This is physical abuse.being slapped, whipped, choked, scratched, bitten in the arm, and shouted at and sworn at
This is emotional abuse. (A form of abuse that is an "outcome" option for the Department, but that is, unfortunately, harder to verify/prove than other forums of abuse.)then having your abusers tell you to commit suicide
It is frustrating that abuse continues. No one here is trying to sweep anything under the carpet.It's pretty insulting and frustrating that physical abuse survivor's stories of pain are swept under the carpet, and so, the abuse continues on, generation after generation
For what it's worth, I have been in two romantic relationships with domestic violence (one past, one current). So I can imagine what this feels like.which is hard to do when you were constantly hit and shouted at.