I was initially unsure where to put this. I thought I'd put it under relationships, then depression, but I concluded anxiety may be better as I am really concerned that I will legitimately lose my mind and I don't know if that's part of one of my anxieties.. I believe it to be true and I believe it will happen in due time if things go the way they do.
Long story short, I'll possibly be losing physical contact with my friend. It's possible we may be able to hang out, but right now it seems unlikely. It may not be until a great time of deal passed.. Just like anyone else I do not handle loneliness well.
Last time I lost physical contact with my friend for a few months I freaked out. My depression took a terrible dip, I became more suicidal, I dissociated a lot more, more night mares, inability to sleep, and that, I'm sure, did not help me think clearly. I already have difficulty thinking when stressed, even with my friend physically keeping contact once in a while, but I feel like I really go off the rail..
I think I typed up a few messages and comments while in that state. It wasn't that bad at the time, yet it felt terrible and I know it looked bad. I realized that I wasn't thinking clearly, but at the same time I couldn't quite.. fix it. I guess. I don't know. I didn't really know what was happening and why.
I don't have many other friends, my best friend is really my only friend. I feel most comfortable with her and we are close. I don't handle change well and it makes my anxiety shoot through the roof.
I also want to add that although I am worried for this, I do not have negative feelings toward my friend or toward the event. This is for the better of her. She is moving away to a place she will have a very good chance of feeling happy and better (which has been proven in the past) and she'll possibly have her dream job. Seeing her happy makes me happy, but I fear the same thing will happen last time and possible worse. I'd rather see her happy than suffer. I realize the high possibility that our relationship is unhealthy, but right now I am more concerned about how I can prepare for this upcoming event.
What would be some suggestions for this?
I'm already thinking I'll try to write down stuff I consider pleasant or that helps me when I'm feeling a little lonely... but I don't know if I'll be able to remember it. I mentioned it to my therapist, but at the moment I am unable to contact her due to me constantly being around people. Speaking of being around all of these people... I feel terrible. A few people think it's because I'm an introvert and I'm being "overstimulated." Anyways, that's another thread or discussion...
Long story short, I'll possibly be losing physical contact with my friend. It's possible we may be able to hang out, but right now it seems unlikely. It may not be until a great time of deal passed.. Just like anyone else I do not handle loneliness well.
Last time I lost physical contact with my friend for a few months I freaked out. My depression took a terrible dip, I became more suicidal, I dissociated a lot more, more night mares, inability to sleep, and that, I'm sure, did not help me think clearly. I already have difficulty thinking when stressed, even with my friend physically keeping contact once in a while, but I feel like I really go off the rail..
I think I typed up a few messages and comments while in that state. It wasn't that bad at the time, yet it felt terrible and I know it looked bad. I realized that I wasn't thinking clearly, but at the same time I couldn't quite.. fix it. I guess. I don't know. I didn't really know what was happening and why.
I don't have many other friends, my best friend is really my only friend. I feel most comfortable with her and we are close. I don't handle change well and it makes my anxiety shoot through the roof.
I also want to add that although I am worried for this, I do not have negative feelings toward my friend or toward the event. This is for the better of her. She is moving away to a place she will have a very good chance of feeling happy and better (which has been proven in the past) and she'll possibly have her dream job. Seeing her happy makes me happy, but I fear the same thing will happen last time and possible worse. I'd rather see her happy than suffer. I realize the high possibility that our relationship is unhealthy, but right now I am more concerned about how I can prepare for this upcoming event.
What would be some suggestions for this?
I'm already thinking I'll try to write down stuff I consider pleasant or that helps me when I'm feeling a little lonely... but I don't know if I'll be able to remember it. I mentioned it to my therapist, but at the moment I am unable to contact her due to me constantly being around people. Speaking of being around all of these people... I feel terrible. A few people think it's because I'm an introvert and I'm being "overstimulated." Anyways, that's another thread or discussion...