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I Don't Know What To Do - Wife Diagnosed With PTSD

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by hurting hub, Nov 13, 2006.

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  1. hurting hub

    hurting hub New Member

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    my wife was dianosed with ptsd. As she was getting counseling she changed.
    1st she said she didn't want to be married any more
    2nd her counselor would call her everytime she left a messege.
    3rd she had me investaged for the same abuse she had as a child with our children. the investgation was dropped.
    4th she said at a marrige counseling she hates men. she had supposed to rid of that at counseling sessions she had 12 years ago. she blamed me for all of her problems and wanted to seperate for a while then try to get back at a later date.
    5th she all of a sudden left in a panic with the children. i think she is with her counselor some where. i hope getting help!
    6th she tried to have domestic violence restraining order placed on me. she came to the hearing and was truly scared of me. The lies she told on me wouldn't hold up! she ran out of the courtroom scared. that i was going to get them. she was trying to destroy me.
    I haven't seen her or my children for almost a month. she believes she protecting the children. i don't know if she is getting help! and i don't know who to call. i called the child abuse agency to see if my children are alright. i need to tell them she has PSTD i forgot when i called!
    I don't know what else to do! help:dontknow:
     
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  3. permban0077

    permban0077 Policy Enforcement Banned

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    my wife was dianosed with ptsd. As she was getting counseling she changed.
    As you bring things up after being diagnosed you go through a lot and the dealing with issues can make your wife way worse in the start, I know as I am a pain in the ass
    1st she said she didn't want to be married any more
    Don't know how to touch this, as I do not know the issues, do you know? My hubs still has not been allowed in on all...
    2nd her counselor would call her everytime she left a messege.
    That is normally called a good doc... And not a bad thing
    3rd she had me investaged for the same abuse she had as a child with our children. the investgation was dropped.
    a bit of "paranoia" (loosely used), being scared of same things that happened to her can easily do that. I have a hard time with some pretty simple situations
    4th she said at a marrige counseling she hates men. she had supposed to rid of that at counseling sessions she had 12 years ago. she blamed me for all of her problems and wanted to seperate for a while then try to get back at a later date.
    Looks like she did not take care of that aspect then or therapist did not finish. Was PTSD aware of then? If not do not expect it to be out of her head, it is a fear, even if irrational to you. Seperation is a fear acting out if no problems at home.
    5th she all of a sudden left in a panic with the children. i think she is with her counselor some where. i hope getting help!
    Confused here? With counselor? If she left in panic something may be triggering it unknown to you and her if no issue at home... flash backs happen
    6th she tried to have domestic violence restraining order placed on me. she came to the hearing and was truly scared of me. The lies she told on me wouldn't hold up! she ran out of the courtroom scared. that i was going to get them. she was trying to destroy me.
    What did she try to say and how is it if it is like her trauma? Something does not fit, something else going on with her? A flash back does not last like that you will need further help than I can offer here.
    I haven't seen her or my children for almost a month. she believes she protecting the children. i don't know if she is getting help! and i don't know who to call. i called the child abuse agency to see if my children are alright. i need to tell them she has PSTD i forgot when i called!
    Not knocking you, but how do you over look that if you think that is a major cause? And how would they know unless involved? Is more to this than being told? We cannot help without details. And CPS would know nothing unless involved already
    I don't know what else to do! help:dontknow:
    We need more details to have a clue really where to even start
     
  4. permban0008

    permban0008 Policy Enforcement Banned

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    Hurting Hub,

    There are certainly a lot of issues there that need clarifying but, the most pressing of those of course is access to and concern about your children. Your wife is an adult and can (in theory anyway) look after herself. I am assuming that you are from the US so don't really know what the child protection people are like there. I would suggest you get in contact with them again immediately and advise them about the PTSD and your concerns for everyone's welfare. Your wife will probably not like it and may consider it a breach of trust but what can you do. The welfare of your children has to be paramount.
     
  5. hurting hub

    hurting hub New Member

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    More i don't know!

    as a child an alcoholic mother and aunt abused her. while drunk her mother would pass out and her date would force to do sexual acts. this went on for a few years. she claimed it stopped when she was 12.

    when we met in AA she told me that I became her first male relationship. we have 3 children one by an drunken overnight and 2 with me. I would take it great care with my sexual advances. Fearing I would not touch her in some. some times she would detach while making love. This is painful for me!

    10 years later and Our marriage deteriorated. lack of sex led me to porn addiction which I know longer have an active problem due to counseling and my pastor. I believe when I admitted it she felt betrayed. She claimed she forgave me. Up until 3 weeks ago at the marriage counseling I she told me she didn't believe me and that she never was "in Love" with me. she told me "I don’t respect him and I can’t forgive him”. the next day she took the children and left me here with some of the thing she held dear. I called her counseling center and her counselor does not work there and hasn't since Aug. I feel that she really thought that I was the enemy. I became all of the men in her life. The last time I saw in her in court she was desperately trying to claim why see was scared of me and she used things of the past and try to say I was violent and even tried to say I was sexually abusing my children but my reply was it was dismissed due to lack of evidence. She left the courtroom saying that some called her and told her where they were. I haven’t even talked to my children in 3 weeks. to be honest after I saw her in this last condition I don' want to go around her. I was going to stay far away.

    The problem started when she went to this counselor to lean how to express her feelings that she was having problems to describe. She told me that her counselor was crying at the end of her session. She also told me that she told her she had PTDS. People gave her gifts at the counseling center because they were addressing her esteem issues. The counselor left but she still had contact with her. This move was set up but something happed at the end she left to fast. she got a job at the church and things got worse. Our marriage went south and all of a sudden today. I think she feels that she is protecting her children. I want to know if she would harm my children? and will her feelings start to change. If I take the kids she might crack I need help!
     
  6. cookie

    cookie I'm a VIP

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    hurting-do you have a lawyer? you need one, if just for protection from untrue claims. i wouldn't know where to start either--hard to tell if she's dealing just with ptsd, or another situation altogether. in the mean time, i can pray for you both.
    cathy
     
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