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I Don't Need To Panic When.

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I don't need to panic. I just don't need to panic. None of us do. But seeing that I do panic let me just remind myself that I don't need to panic when things are vague and people are quiet and busy with things in their own lives. No it doesn't mean they are or that they're about to stonewall me like the ex abuser did on a regular basis for 9 years to control and manipulate me. I really need to keep reminding myself that sometimes people's lives get legitimately busy and it doesn't have a damn thing to do with me. Actually I think I get that but PTSD scares me with it and I hate it.
 
I don't need to panic (like I did yesterday, anxiety attack and all) when I have breast cancer symptoms, I need to be level headed and do what needs to be done. First I need to make an appointment to see an oncologist, then get a diagnostic mammogram and then probably a biopsy. The Dr. will decide what to do then, according to the results. Just because I have symptoms, does not mean I have the disease itself.

Medicare is open on Sundays, so I called them to get some info. The lady there was very helpful. I will call an Oncologist tomorrow. Since my medical plan does not require going to my regular Dr. first, I am not going to bother. I'm going directly go to the ones who can help me.

I pray it is nothing, but I know better than to rely upon wishful thinking alone. This is a time to act decisively and not to panic!

Prayers are welcome!
 
I had to have the plumber out today because the bathroom sink was clogged up. As he was working on it, a piece of the pipe broke off behind the sink vanity.

I began to panic when he said that he would have to remove the vanity to get to the pipe. I became physically sick when he said this. I told him to put on his thinking cap and think of another way which he did. I began to panic just at the thought of this being a bigger deal than I thought it was supposed to be and at the amount of money this would cost me.

Just glad that he was able to think of a way to fix it so my panic level would go down.
 
I have been seeing this OT for about a month. I have been waiting for him to ask me some personal questions about myself but he hasn't until today.

He asked if my parents were alive and if I had a brother or a sister. I answered him with short answers. I didn't have to panic because he didn't ask any more questions about me.

Knowing how vulnerable I am right now, I'm relieved that I handled it okay.
 
I don't need to panic when people feel comfortable around me and stand close;
I don't need to panic because I'm in a woman's body even though I am scared by it;
I don't need to panic when I'm reminded of softness when my own hair touches my face;
I don't need to panic when I hear the sink gurgling or a trickle of running water.
 
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