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I don't think this is right.

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Cannottakethis

MyPTSD Pro
When I told my spouse that my social anxiety was keeping me from doing things I used to do, like going to the mall by myself, he told me it's not safe to go to malls and he can take me when I want to go.

He told me that I needed to go away for 2 years and get "reprogrammed" so I could think right.

I should "just stop" catastrophizing and having black and white thinking..,when I start to defend myself I'm being "drama".
So I shut up.

And my favorite, he knows more about (ptsd, borderline, bipolar etc) than any professional because he's been living with me for so long.

Then he wants to know what's wrong when I'm depressed and have nothing to say to him.

It's almost as if he doesn't think I can get better even while getting help.
 
@Shells With that kind of support, I hope you're not paying a therapist???????? :banghead::banghead::banghead:
 
Sorry. I know it's hard for people to understand, BELIEVE me.

I understand though. And probably most of the people on here do too. Social things are impossible for me also, and the ones closest to me think I'm doing it to be rude or make people dislike me. People want you to act and react from a one size fits all way of relating. Meanwhile I'd rather either not participate or if I have to, keep to myself and socialize from my own comfort level. I think its about making goals and taking small steps to improve yourself. Improve yourself for yourself though. Because YOU want to!

When you essentially give up on defending yourself, etc. how does your hubby react to that? How do you feel when you can't defend yourself?
 
@She Cat, I just started with a new therapist. Our goal is to make me more self sufficient and hopefully more ready to re-enter the workforce in some capacity.

@anonymous yes, his brain doesn't think like other people. I'd love to have him just get some insight.

@Supervixn when I stop talking he gets mad. Sometimes I'm able to end the conversation but a lot of times it just keeps going in circles. I've been so reactive lately... it's horrible. I'm back in dbt again so hopefully it will help.
 
My husband doesn't understand my ptsd either. When I point out things that have changed for me he looks so confused, then will say "I hear you." (Because that is how we resolved our "communication argument" as long as he responds with that... I can deal, even though I know he has no clue what we are talking about)

My newest efforts is to just tell him things that I can't handle due to anxiety. I just flat out say "No." He was recently wanting ideas on how to increase our income. I have contracted stuff I can set up that pays $200 each time. But I can only do so much in my schedule before I get overwhelmed. So logically, I should set up a bunch of those and add as many private students as possible, but I need limits or I won't be able to do any of it. This is the part he has trouble understanding. He is an "earner" and if money comes from it, he doesn't stress. I used to be able to function like that, but now it causes me to cease breathing. Ptsd really does make things a lot harder!!!
 
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