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I Need a Life

Discussion in 'General' started by Grama-Herc, Nov 17, 2007.

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  1. Grama-Herc

    Grama-Herc I'm a VIP

    Back in the days when I was out in the world I would hear the phrase "Get a life". Never really knew what it was referring to until now. I, in deed, need a life.

    You could set your watch by my so called life. I do the same thing every day at the same time with little to no change. I am merely existing, noy living! I am to scared to live. I am to frightened to go out and get the life I deserve.

    It has really been a long time since I have been so depressed or in such a truly negative state of mind. I am lonely, truly lonely. The part that is so hard to take is that this is self imposed. Granted, I do have problems as we all do, but where is it written that we need to be so lonely??

    Oh never mind my funky mood guys. God night
     
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  3. hodge

    hodge I'm a VIP Premium Member Donated

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    Herc, just trying to respond...is there anything in particular you would like to go out and do that you don't do? You mention getting out and getting the life you deserve. I just wondered if there are things you'd like to explore. Maybe if you talk more about what you might like to do, we could help you overcome fears of doing it?

    Oh, and by the way, no worries about funky moods. Boy, am I in one tonight;)
     
  4. She Cat

    She Cat I'm a VIP Premium Member Sponsor $100+

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    Herc,

    I think that to a degree we all have those funky mood times. They just drag you down, and zap the life out of you. You get caught up in the rut and then don't know how to get out of it. Then you have been out of it (life) for so long that it's hard to get back into life.

    I also think that life for all of us is what WE consider normal for us. Everyone is different, and has different comfort zones.

    If you truly want to get back into life....My suggestion is whatever you do or try. Start small and make sure that it's something that you truly love and have a passion about.

    Hope that you have a better day today.
     
  5. Marlene

    Marlene I'm a VIP Premium Member

    Herc,

    Raising my hand for the funky mood crowd. We all get them and they do pass...thank goodness!

    As for you getting a life (or as Wendy put it 'getting back into life') then I, too, would suggest you start small and slow. I know that you enjoy working with orphaned baby animals, but you're not able to do it in your new home like you wanted. Is it within the realm of possibility that you go, say once a week for a couple of hours, to the animal shelter and work with them there? That would be a way to start getting out of the house a little more and pushing the edges of your comfort zone.

    I know that this is difficult to do. But small steps are the best way to start.

    Lisa
     
  6. Grama-Herc

    Grama-Herc I'm a VIP

    Well Ladies, seems to be us alone who respond to funky moods these days. I went to the animal shelter 3 days ago to take pass along a donation that had been given to me for them.

    My first impression of my visit was that for some reason I seemed to be trespassing on their precious ground. So I decided to go to the adoption center--with an open mind-- and I apparently was not welcome there either.

    This may be a small cause of my mood? ? ? ? ? ? It certainly hurt my feelings to know that after being a shelter home for almost 9 years and saving some of the most critical orphan kittens they had, That I was not welcome to return let alone even be there. It did hurt, a bunch.

    But, at aleast I tryed. So guess I need to find some other way to get out and about. I could never make a go at getting myself to the SPCA. Have tryed many times---just to far from home! ! !

    I have however, taken my funky mood and used it for good. I have been cleaning and sorting and junking junk for days now. Mom can't decide whether I have not taken my meds or if I have taken to much. But I really am doing better. I have always vented my moods by cleaning and sorting , etc.

    So for now, the mood has passed and I have a new problem. Miss Fancy Pants, my youngest cat has decided that the new easy chair belongs to her and she is getting rather pushy about it. Whinning and head butting me to GET OUT OF HER CHAIR. It would be funny if it wasn't so annoying. Considering everything I am doing pretty good and I know I am lucky So guess that is all for now Thanx guys for listening
     
  7. She Cat

    She Cat I'm a VIP Premium Member Sponsor $100+

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    Herc,

    As far the experiences with the animal shelter and the adoption center....Could it have been their mood and not yours???? Why do we always assume it just has to be us? Other people have off days too.

    You did great and if at all possible try again to find your little "nitch" in the world to get you out more. Now I want you to know that this wonderful advice is coming from someone who spent the entire day on the couch yesterday. I probably have bed sores to prove it too!!!!

    I did go out ALL day Sat. with a friend though.
     
  8. hollyberry

    hollyberry Active Member

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    I have thought for years I had a life. Working any wheres fron 60-100 hours a week. Paid off, best manager in 2 districts, probably highest paid too. But realizing its not a life. Im a workaclohlic (god I wish I could spell) Been working so I didn't have to deal with life. Realizing I have everything I lost as a kid right here in dover delaware, have 3 sons, 2 daughter in laws and 3 grand kids and a pretty great husband of 28 years. cant wait to deal with the past stuff and start enjoying what I have. Spent last 20 years going back to maine and trying to get what I lost in 73. This past summer we all went up in 3 cars, kids are stuggling to make ends meet so paid most of the cost out of our pockets. go back twice a year, just trying to get back what I lost but its not there its here.
     
  9. Grama-Herc

    Grama-Herc I'm a VIP

    Well She, While I am very sensitive, trust me when I say I was not welcome at either facility I went to. Would love to return to them and help but it IS NOT an option. I have enough problems. Trying to volunteer in a place with that much stress, tension and not feeling welcome is not something I can handle. Adding that kind of stress is not my idea of fun---Don't need it! Maybe my niche is right here at home, caring form my mother and trying to m ake up for being such a crappy kid. Making mom comfortable, safe and happy is not such a bad way to live. Especially since my mom is neat and extremely undemanding, considerate of me and always showing me how much she appreciates everything I do for her.

    Not such a bad life I guess. I think the post from hollyberry made me realize just how really lucky I am. What is that old saying? "Sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees?'" Thanx guys for keeping me on the straight and narrow HERC
     
  10. cactus_jack

    cactus_jack Well-Known Member

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    Herc, tell me. What kind of life do you want?
     
  11. Grama-Herc

    Grama-Herc I'm a VIP

    Well hey there Jack!

    What an interesting question you purpose! I have never been asked that question before. Now I have to "think". Thinking has always gotten me in trouble. When I said I wanted a life my sense is I wanted a "normal" life. But what exactly is a normal life? That in itself is a question many can't answer.

    I have since discovered that a life is what you make of it. You can't order one, you can't invent one, ya just have to live the life you feel safe and comfortable in. I think that I was in the middle of my very own personal pity party. Posibly even a little lonely too. I have always known that another person can not make you happy. You make yourself happy and that is really the life I want. Just a happy one!

    Thanks for pushing me into actually facing this question. You are a very smart person to see into my post. Keep track of me and help keep me on the right road.

    Good wishes to you Many Thanx HERC
     
    permban0077 likes this.
  12. cactus_jack

    cactus_jack Well-Known Member

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    Well Herc, look like the time is now for you to decide what kind of life you want. If you want we can discuss this here or in PM.
     
  13. permban0077

    permban0077 Policy Enforcement Banned

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    I for one would like to see this continue here. Not often someone puts that mirror up and makes us look.
     
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