annafennutchi
Learning
I want to share my story with people, but I never know how to start, I always hear it as such an unbelievable story, that no one will ever understand. But here goes.
I was molested by my older brother from the age of 8 until 13. The abuse started out playful and non-threatening, like a game. I don't remember getting much attention from anyone in my family before that, and I remember it felt nice for someone to pay me some. It wasn't until after he had come to me a few times that it turned evil. It went from mild touching to demanding I allow him to insert fingers into my vagina, I knew that it was wrong but to me it was too late, if I told anyone now, they would blame me for not stopping it the first time it happened. I fought back and tried to resist, but he would hit me and throw me against his wall over and over. I felt like it was my punishment for not telling someone in the beginning.
When we moved from that house a couple of years later, I thought that by some stroke of luck, the abuse would stop. By this time he was 15, I was 10. Little did I know things would only get worse. My parents worked farther away from home which gave him more time to work with. If I took a shower, he would come in. He made me touch him or let him touch me. One time I tried to fight in there and he whacked me on the head with the shower massager, after having to come up with a story for that one, I didn't fight him in there anymore.
By this time I had become numb and just went through the motions. I felt it was easier to do that instead of getting my ass kicked. I felt like I was less than nothing, a subcreature, this was my hell and I wished I was dead.
My numbness triggered a new level of abuse. He no longer did anything to me without hurting me. he even put a lock at the top of his door to make it so hard to unlock that he had time to catch me if I tried to run. He now fancied throwing me down and holding my arms with his knees he would force me to perform oral sex. I tried to bite him once, he punched me so hard in the chest, I couldn't breathe, it felt like he had killed me-I hoped. No such luck, I came to with the feeling of him climaxing,I always had to swallow or suffer more punishment.
This is only the beginning, but I can't go on right now, this has worn me out. Thank you to you all for listening to me and giving me your support. I will share more another time:sleep: :dontknow:
I was molested by my older brother from the age of 8 until 13. The abuse started out playful and non-threatening, like a game. I don't remember getting much attention from anyone in my family before that, and I remember it felt nice for someone to pay me some. It wasn't until after he had come to me a few times that it turned evil. It went from mild touching to demanding I allow him to insert fingers into my vagina, I knew that it was wrong but to me it was too late, if I told anyone now, they would blame me for not stopping it the first time it happened. I fought back and tried to resist, but he would hit me and throw me against his wall over and over. I felt like it was my punishment for not telling someone in the beginning.
When we moved from that house a couple of years later, I thought that by some stroke of luck, the abuse would stop. By this time he was 15, I was 10. Little did I know things would only get worse. My parents worked farther away from home which gave him more time to work with. If I took a shower, he would come in. He made me touch him or let him touch me. One time I tried to fight in there and he whacked me on the head with the shower massager, after having to come up with a story for that one, I didn't fight him in there anymore.
By this time I had become numb and just went through the motions. I felt it was easier to do that instead of getting my ass kicked. I felt like I was less than nothing, a subcreature, this was my hell and I wished I was dead.
My numbness triggered a new level of abuse. He no longer did anything to me without hurting me. he even put a lock at the top of his door to make it so hard to unlock that he had time to catch me if I tried to run. He now fancied throwing me down and holding my arms with his knees he would force me to perform oral sex. I tried to bite him once, he punched me so hard in the chest, I couldn't breathe, it felt like he had killed me-I hoped. No such luck, I came to with the feeling of him climaxing,I always had to swallow or suffer more punishment.
This is only the beginning, but I can't go on right now, this has worn me out. Thank you to you all for listening to me and giving me your support. I will share more another time:sleep: :dontknow: