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Inner child

Discussion in 'Anonymous' started by Jekew, Dec 12, 2017.

  1. Opaf

    Opaf Anonymous

    Absolutely.

    You don’t play? At all? No sports, music, debate, art, mechanics, games, politics, cooking, nothing? Or he’s wanting you to play with toddler toys, and bang trucks together whilst wearing underwear on your head, and you think that’s stupid?
     
    Searching4Self likes this.
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  3. Dokud

    Dokud Anonymous

    When I first started therapy, my therapist was talking to me about my inner child and I was very skeptical at the time and really tried and it seemed that my inner little was dead. Then I did not believe that I had one for a very long time.

    I am now one hundred percent convinced that my inner little is alive and speaking. I am not playing with toys but I have adopted some of my stuffed animals and sleep with three at night now. I can do this because it does not hurt anyone and I live alone.

    But I have noticed such a growing attachment to my stuffies and it does help to sleep with mine on my chest at night and it is a regular thing now in my sleeping routines.

    I am still new to this and am exploring this concept for myself and learning somethings about myself like for instance, just how brave and strong my little was in being alone in such a crazymaking and very abusive environment with my abusive parents. This was the begining of self love for the child I was and how valiant she was in trying to be a good girl and trying to please the abusive crazymaking parents.

    I sure hope that this makes some sense to you and I wish you the best.:hug:
     
    Searching4Self likes this.
  4. Fitov

    Fitov Anonymous

    At first I didn’t understand inner child work either. But I would like to share my understanding and experience. Sorry if the post is very long.

    Your t uses the word parts. Mine used the word ego.
    From a very young age, ( I believe the age of two) we start to store memories in the deep part of our brains. It can be good or bad, but their there. The older we get the closer the memories are to the surface. If you experience trauma as a child it is stored and as we know, some we remember, some we don’t.
    The memories are there and so is the emotions that go with the memories.
    As adults we may not have the memory because it’s so deep but we do have the emotions that is connected to the memory. As a child our egos are one. When we experience trauma the ego splits, it’s how we survive. When the ego splits, anxiety comes in because we are no longer a hole. As adults we can trigger these childhood emotions and split egos. Sometimes ( not all ) our behaviour can be viewed as childish, that’s because it is the inner child.

    As an adult I’m out spoken, have good Communication skills and would take no BS from anyone. Then BAM! Someone I trusted and loved became aggressive, very angry, emotionally and verbally abusive. My father became an alcoholic a little later in my childhood. He could be verbally,emotionally and at times physically abusive but also a very loving and caring father. So here’s my trigger. Anyway, now I’m in therapy and
    working on my inner child. I was able to connect with her and the trauma I experienced and when my egos split.

    My egos that split where, safe and strength. If I wanted to feel safe I couldn’t feel strong. If I wanted to feel strong I couldn’t feel safe. Through EMDR and art therapy I was able to bring the two egos back together. Which helped my anxiety. Then I worked on nurturing my inner child and making her feel safe. Reconnecting with her by, in some ways play. Like colouring in adult colouring books, playing video games with my kids, watching a kids movie,etc.
    My adult self had to prove to my inner child self that she was safe and I would protect her. That meant, I would not let anyone abuse me in anyway.
    Sorry this was so long and I understand if no one made it to the end. I just hope in some way it helped.
     
    Wilmot and Rain like this.
  5. Dokud

    Dokud Anonymous

    It did help actually, thank you for the explanation.
     
    Rain and Mytime like this.
  6. Avo

    Avo Anonymous

    My therapist talks about the "little girl" that didn't get what she needed... I want to crawl under the table every time she says that because I am not a little girl anymore AND quite frankly I didn't have the typical "little girl" life experience so I don't really know how a normal little girl should think or feel. I am disconnected mainly because I can't even begin to know how to "nurture" her or even acknowledge her existence. I am pretty sure I came out of the womb at least 40 years old... hahaha! Anyway, I get the importance of trying to make your timeline in life contiguous and fluid even if the events of your life were chaotic, however I struggle with the mental picture of being small. Good luck! I hope you are able to make peace!
     
    Rain likes this.
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