Hi,
I'm pretty new to forums and they've always scared me because it feels like giving people the opportunity to judge you for what you might say which is one of my biggest fears. I've decided to write this anyway, though because I really need some support at the moment and I'm too scared to come forward in my own life.
I'm Becky, I'm a teenager and I am currently in therapy for anxiety and depression. I am seeing a psychologist next week and my therapist thinks that it is likely I will be put on anti depressants. The thing is, that whilst I'm trying hard to deal with anxiety and depression, I've barely dealt with PTSD and the traumatic events that are the cause for a lot of my problems. I struggle to be 100% honest, even with my therapist. I've dealt with sexual abuse in my life, both times from close friends who were girls. I've also made a lot of mistakes in my life out of lack of understanding for what I was doing, which I think was because of my abuse and these mistakes just make me feel gross and ashamed. I have only told my therapist about the most recent case, because I'm terrified of what she'll think of me if she knows it has happened more than once.
I keep on finding myself so wrapped up in my trauma that it is impossible to shake the feeling and I'm just looking for some support and some people who can relate to the way that I feel.
Thanks so much for reading.
I'm pretty new to forums and they've always scared me because it feels like giving people the opportunity to judge you for what you might say which is one of my biggest fears. I've decided to write this anyway, though because I really need some support at the moment and I'm too scared to come forward in my own life.
I'm Becky, I'm a teenager and I am currently in therapy for anxiety and depression. I am seeing a psychologist next week and my therapist thinks that it is likely I will be put on anti depressants. The thing is, that whilst I'm trying hard to deal with anxiety and depression, I've barely dealt with PTSD and the traumatic events that are the cause for a lot of my problems. I struggle to be 100% honest, even with my therapist. I've dealt with sexual abuse in my life, both times from close friends who were girls. I've also made a lot of mistakes in my life out of lack of understanding for what I was doing, which I think was because of my abuse and these mistakes just make me feel gross and ashamed. I have only told my therapist about the most recent case, because I'm terrified of what she'll think of me if she knows it has happened more than once.
I keep on finding myself so wrapped up in my trauma that it is impossible to shake the feeling and I'm just looking for some support and some people who can relate to the way that I feel.
Thanks so much for reading.