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Messy room question

Discussion in 'Childhood' started by shygirl7721, Nov 14, 2017.

  1. shygirl7721

    shygirl7721 New Member

    When I was younger, probably around 7 or 8, my family moved. In our new house, my siblings and I all shared a bed room that was at the end of our home. Our window was on the edge of our house.
    We had/have neighbors who (still, to this day) liked to trespass and steal our things and bother us. When I was 7 or 8 I woke up in the middle of the night because I heard a tapping noise. I was extremely scared because the noise woke me up and I had no clue what it was. I looked out of my sibling and I's bedroom window and I saw our neighbor tapping on the window, smiling at me. I was a child and did the silly "if I hide he won't see me" so I got under the blanket and it didn't stop. Eventually I got so scared I ran out of the bedroom and into the living room where my mom was and I hid under her blanket and woke her up scared.
    A few years later she would tell me that she saw someone through our living room window that night walking behind the house.
    I can't sleep unless my window is covered and I can't see out or if I think someone can see in. I'm paranoid and I couldnt stay in my own room until I was about 13 or so. I'm older now but I still can't sleep without a covered window and I don't feel safe going to sleep unless my room is messy and things are all on the floor (I've figured this out recently, when I clean my room it always ends up messy again no matter what I try.) Is this PTSD or paranoia or something else? I'm sorry for the long post, I just want to know what could be going on. Thank you in advance :)
    Rain likes this.
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  3. Fadeaway

    Fadeaway I'm a VIP

    This doesn't qualify as PTSD but something like that can have a major impact on you without causing PTSD. I think your reaction is not out of the range of normal. It made you feel unsafe and vulnerable. There is something about clutter that makes some people feel stalker. If there is an intruder, they are going to trip on stuff and wake you up maybe?

    Personally, I don't know how anyone can sleep without a window covered. I think it is weird when people have their curtains open after dark and you can see right in when people are driving by, maybe it is just me, but having your windows uncovered at night is just advertising that you are asking for trouble.
    Rain likes this.
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