I turn into a different person in therapy. In real life, I am a highly competent and confident adult, but in her office, inner child takes over. It's as though I have a dual identity. It's an internal battle and I watch in amazement every time I go in there that adult disappears and the tortured young one who is shut down takes over. I know I struggle staying present and keeping my eyes focused on one thing is almost impossible. They dart all over. Eye.contact with my therapist is very fleeting. Too intense! Today she held up 2 fingers and challenged me to keep looking at them and I couldn't! I HAD to look away. It was as though even though it wasn't eye contact it was still too much of a connection. WTF? I can't even look at fingers???? She suggested it might be a neurological symptom from the trauma that I cannot keep my eyes focused, but again, it only happens in therapy. So much wierdness in trauma is ready to pop out when you least expect it. Has anyone else ever experienced anything like this?