I new memory came back this morning. The story of the event that caused my PTSD has been pretty unspectacular. Just a dumb girl sleeping with someone she didn't necessarily want to. Not the first or last time that happened. But this particular time just really messed me up and made me want to die every time I thought about it. Previously I remembered being outside sitting on a picnic table, then being naked in his bed with condoms on the floor, then my friend standing near the top of the stairs looking for me.
For a little while now I thought I must have wanted to use the restroom and that's how I got in the house because I know where that room is in relation to the stairs. So I was thinking about that this morning when I had a memory flash of him grabbing me around the throat and slamming me into a door jam. His fingers are right where I've had a strange feeling on my neck for a couple of months now.
It's real, right? Why would my brain make that up? Are more going to pop up? (I realize you can't actually answer any of these questions)
For a little while now I thought I must have wanted to use the restroom and that's how I got in the house because I know where that room is in relation to the stairs. So I was thinking about that this morning when I had a memory flash of him grabbing me around the throat and slamming me into a door jam. His fingers are right where I've had a strange feeling on my neck for a couple of months now.
It's real, right? Why would my brain make that up? Are more going to pop up? (I realize you can't actually answer any of these questions)