LindsayWasHere
New Here
forgive me if im doing this all wrong as im not used to forums, but i felt this would be a good place to learn how to handle what im about to go through in the most effective way possible. i am completely greatful for any help anyone here is able to give me.
i just met a guy who i felt immediately fond of, he's such a nice guy...he's really a sweetheart. at first we both seemed mutually head over heals and i thought it was just perfect. before hand he DID indicate apprehensions about meeting up with me (afraid of new social encounters), i thought nothing of it and assumed he had a little anxiety. after a few dates he made mention that he recently had a traumatic effect from a bad reaction to pot, he said his senses went crazy, he was hallucinating, and the experience kind of messed him up. After the event he had re-occurring experiences of the trauma and he was hospitalized for maybe a week.
He's now on several medications including anti-depressants and anti-psychotics (this happened maybe a year ago). Though i didn't notice it at first, im now realizing he's quite distant and his moods are constantly shifting. We'll have a good interaction (such as an intimate discussion) and after he seems very positively effected....then several seconds later i see some kind of sad emptiness in his eyes. At first i was feeling really hurt and confused, like i was giving him all the good things i had to offer and it wasn't making him happy, NOW im realizing it's not to do with me.
We had a long talk when i confronted him him about reserving feelings from me, he has a VERY hard time expressing himself but i often play the psychiatrist role for my friends so I'm good at getting to the bottom of things. I helped him see the reality of some of his feelings and how he was distorting his view of things and he seemed grateful that i was able to help him sort through feelings he didn't understand.
Right now im trying to understand exactly how one goes about treating this problem..and as a girlfriend what can i do to be as supportive as possible? im also trying to keep my own feelings in mind....as a 21 year old college girl is this going to drain me of too much energy? i feel horrible that such a nice guy has to go through this at such a young age (23) i wish i could fix him but i don't want it to mess up MY focus. at his age is this somthing he will be stuck with for the rest of his life? can it be 100% treated? when he's zoning out or generating negative feelings what can i do to counteract that and provide a calm for him?
i just met a guy who i felt immediately fond of, he's such a nice guy...he's really a sweetheart. at first we both seemed mutually head over heals and i thought it was just perfect. before hand he DID indicate apprehensions about meeting up with me (afraid of new social encounters), i thought nothing of it and assumed he had a little anxiety. after a few dates he made mention that he recently had a traumatic effect from a bad reaction to pot, he said his senses went crazy, he was hallucinating, and the experience kind of messed him up. After the event he had re-occurring experiences of the trauma and he was hospitalized for maybe a week.
He's now on several medications including anti-depressants and anti-psychotics (this happened maybe a year ago). Though i didn't notice it at first, im now realizing he's quite distant and his moods are constantly shifting. We'll have a good interaction (such as an intimate discussion) and after he seems very positively effected....then several seconds later i see some kind of sad emptiness in his eyes. At first i was feeling really hurt and confused, like i was giving him all the good things i had to offer and it wasn't making him happy, NOW im realizing it's not to do with me.
We had a long talk when i confronted him him about reserving feelings from me, he has a VERY hard time expressing himself but i often play the psychiatrist role for my friends so I'm good at getting to the bottom of things. I helped him see the reality of some of his feelings and how he was distorting his view of things and he seemed grateful that i was able to help him sort through feelings he didn't understand.
Right now im trying to understand exactly how one goes about treating this problem..and as a girlfriend what can i do to be as supportive as possible? im also trying to keep my own feelings in mind....as a 21 year old college girl is this going to drain me of too much energy? i feel horrible that such a nice guy has to go through this at such a young age (23) i wish i could fix him but i don't want it to mess up MY focus. at his age is this somthing he will be stuck with for the rest of his life? can it be 100% treated? when he's zoning out or generating negative feelings what can i do to counteract that and provide a calm for him?