Hello All, I am a 20+ year veteran police officer. My last assignment was the Commander of both the Operations and Support divisions. I left the job just over a year ago. I couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t handle the panic attacks, nightmares,anxiety attacks and many more issues any longer. In the end I couldn’t even responded to officers calls for help. That’s when I realized I had to go. I was in denial for years and hide everything. Not only was my work suffering so was my family life. I put the job before my family and it has taken a hudge toll on my relationship with my wife and kids. Fortunately I have a wonderful wife who did not give up on me. I have been in weekly therapy for over a year now and have been diagnosed with PTSD and depression. My therapist and I have identified over 20 traumatic events of both personal (one event) and the rest work traumas, I am on several meds that have helped reduce my symptoms. Frequently, my symptoms flare but are not as intense as before. They sill leave me out of touch with reality. I am trying towork through all of this but there does not seem to be a light at the end of the tunnel. I feel so overwhelmed, trying to repair the damage I have caused myself and the people closest to me. I am so stressed and can’t even think about going back to work. I was able to medically retire but I am fighting the cause. They believe my PTSD is not related to the job. I have also applied for Social Security. It’s been 9 months, I have done their testing and still no answer. Can anyone give me an idea of how long this will last? I know it is different for everyone just trying to get a ballpark. Also have any of you been able to go back to work after leaving and receiving disability. I would like to go back to work but am not sure I could. Any advise or personal testimonials would be greatly appreciated.