Stanley Shi-Yume
Confident
As pointless as it seems my behavior of escape into distractions has been... I have spent time during the past 4 years working on my art, and this is the only distraction that has left something of use to me.
It comes and goes as something to hold my attention-- Energy builds and then releases in my sounds.
It takes a long time to become your own fan, when you make anything creative. It is difficult. Even if you pull it off once, that leaves you in a state of depletion and while longing to do it again, there is not often any spark there to re-create the organic success that you experienced.
I did not comprehend my efforts as authentic expression of myself until recently. It is the ONLY thing I feel I've been able to do in my life that communicates me as a true human being. Therefore it is my one success.
Words don't express it, nothing does, only the sound. It's something else from what I feel in affection for my child, that is a bond & connection, that plugs me in to being human, what I am.
The art plugs me in to accepting my real self, who I am. When I realized that writing a song was an act of emotional validation, leaving an object I could revisit to feel real again when I needed to, that's when I became truly my own fan.
It comes and goes as something to hold my attention-- Energy builds and then releases in my sounds.
It takes a long time to become your own fan, when you make anything creative. It is difficult. Even if you pull it off once, that leaves you in a state of depletion and while longing to do it again, there is not often any spark there to re-create the organic success that you experienced.
I did not comprehend my efforts as authentic expression of myself until recently. It is the ONLY thing I feel I've been able to do in my life that communicates me as a true human being. Therefore it is my one success.
Words don't express it, nothing does, only the sound. It's something else from what I feel in affection for my child, that is a bond & connection, that plugs me in to being human, what I am.
The art plugs me in to accepting my real self, who I am. When I realized that writing a song was an act of emotional validation, leaving an object I could revisit to feel real again when I needed to, that's when I became truly my own fan.