TheGirlfriend
New Here
Ive never joined a support group before but I found this site in my research on PTSD and thank God I did. I need advice, there are so many issues that I just dont understand. I met my bf online a few months ago, he has combat PTSD along with childhood abuse and suffered spinal and head trauma in Afganistan. It was amazing, we both felt like we'd found our life partner. Hours on the phone, texting, messaging.. we both made the 6 hour drive to be together for weekends and everything seemed perfect. He was so attentive and loving, sending me songs and quotes, love notes and referring to us being together for our lifetime. Things changed a bit about a month ago and he was less attentive and the phone conversations became shorter and farther apart. He came to visit me last weekend and was in horrible pain from the 6 hr drive, he made the comment he'd never drive it again.. only fly. He told me during this visit I had made him mad because I texted him when I knew he was driving, I apologized and he said he'd told me not to do that. He hadnt and I told him so but assured him that it wouldnt happen again. While he was here he received a text message from his ex gf. I picked it up and saw some flirty comments and him saying "I love u".. I asked him about it and he deleted immediately and said it was from a long time ago. I could see from the look in his eyes he was triggered (now I realize that). Later on I saw a message accidentally with him telling someone he was about to call "the ex gf".. I flipped.. He lied and said he didnt do it, someone obviously doctored the convo and he was pissed that I had told him I was done with this stuff without giving him a chance to explain. He then told me that he was pissed Id gone thru his phone and seen the text previously from the ex. He's contacting her through a game that we play that I have since left. Hes become aggressive, detached, angry, cold and continues to blame me for not giving him the opportunity to tell me the truth.. that he had not told anyone he was calling the ex. ( which I know 100% he did). He now says I constantly overreact and he doesnt want that kind of relationship. I dont either. His meds have changed and hes under stress, I need to know if Im dealing with someone who truly id the person I first knew or if this is who he really is and its time to go. He seems to be finding fault in things that he wouldnt have before, like the way I prounounced his childs name and the correct way to wear a necklace he gave me. Its like hes a different person over the last 2-3 weeks. I need help and advice from anyone who might have insight into whats happening here. Its like hes trying to get me to end it so he doesnt have to.. but is this really him? Im completely confused and hurting.. I need you guys here.