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General Ptsd husband has issues with daughter's boyfriend

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chris wal

My husband of 20 years has PTSD, some of it stems from when he was in the Navy 24 years ago. It stems from after being out to sea for 6months he came back to discover his 1st wife ran off with his best friend. His marriage was over. He and I met and had 3 daughters who never dated. Our oldest is at college and has meet a very nice boy who actually lives 30 min from us. But they live in the same building at college. Anyway I think my husband's PTSD is causing him to dislike the boyfriend. I absolutely love this boy as her 1st boyfriend and I can totally see them getting married after college.

We spent time with my daughter and her boyfriend over Christmas break.. he's not perfect but it's nothing that can't be over looked. So how do I find out if his dislike is PTSD related or not. My theory is he sees this boy as taking his daughter away and is reliving the experience from 20+ years ago. advise. Thoughts
 
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His PTSD would not have been from coming back and finding his wife left with the best friend. That isn't a traumatic experience according to the requirements for PTSD. Sometimes a stressor like that can be the trigger that brings out the effects of the real trauma. It might be worth getting a better understanding of what he has gone through.

His PTSD won't be causing him to dislike the boyfriend but his past personal experiences may be influencing him and making him cautious about him. That can happen with anyone. Why not ask him that? Are your past experiences with ex wife affecting your opinion of X? Or ask him what he feels about X and why and really listen. People have different perspectives and they are often legitimate.
 
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