My (new) therapist speculates I have PTSD. I'm shocked. But I'm open to the possibility that is may be true, even though I'm having a hard time seeing it that way.
I was verbally abused at home as a child, and as a result left home in my early teens. I entered therapy immediately, and continued for many years, on and off as I felt needed. I have no doubt I experienced depression and anxiety during my adolescence while surviving on my own, but came out on top against all odds.
Flash forward over 20 years. I have a very healthy lifestyle combining exercise, good diet, daily meditation and reflection, hobbies, a loving long-term marriage, friendships, extended family circles, successful finance and career, living a comfortable modern life near the beach - I have thoroughly enjoyed my adult life and still do, traveling around the world, learning, growing... all that has lead me to wonderful experiences and connections I'm most grateful for. Hence, the surprise at being told I possibly have PTSD.
So here's what happened - I recently burnt out from a long-term job that I once thrived on. I figured the symptoms of burnt out were just that - from overwork. So I'm taking ample time off to reconsider another career choice, or go back to something more manageable. Initially, I fell physically sick immediately once I left (minor illness), and experienced some intense emotional flat-lining for a couple of weeks (the feeling that if I died that would be just fine because I had no energy or desire left - though I wasn't suicidal by any means). It was a horrible feeling to be that depressed, but I also figured it would pass. And it did. As I felt better I moved through deep bouts of sadness... on and off… seemingly out of nowhere... or sensitivity to things that normally wouldn't bother me... or sudden anxiety even when I was just having some fun playing sports or hanging out with friends… some of it was quite frightening and with depth I hadn't felt since I was a teenager… but I didn't panic and instead just went to find a therapist. The therapist suggested it might be PTSD.
Given that I take enormous time for self-care and stillness, while burn-out symptoms include adrenal fatigue as well as depression/anxiety… I don't see it what I have going on as PTSD… but am I wrong? Did the burn-out trigger it? If it's PTSD, in what way? I asked my therapist and they stated that it sounds like my childhood rearing it's head at this time...
I'm feeling better each day, and the symptoms have greatly subsided… they were extreme and intense, but not long lasting... a few hours at a time at most… and I'm already feeling like my normal self again… I'm cautious, but so far, so good. I'm still going to therapy because it helps to have someone listen as I contemplate a career change, and I want to make sure my mental health is on track then given my strong reactions...
Feedback from more experienced folks?
I was verbally abused at home as a child, and as a result left home in my early teens. I entered therapy immediately, and continued for many years, on and off as I felt needed. I have no doubt I experienced depression and anxiety during my adolescence while surviving on my own, but came out on top against all odds.
Flash forward over 20 years. I have a very healthy lifestyle combining exercise, good diet, daily meditation and reflection, hobbies, a loving long-term marriage, friendships, extended family circles, successful finance and career, living a comfortable modern life near the beach - I have thoroughly enjoyed my adult life and still do, traveling around the world, learning, growing... all that has lead me to wonderful experiences and connections I'm most grateful for. Hence, the surprise at being told I possibly have PTSD.
So here's what happened - I recently burnt out from a long-term job that I once thrived on. I figured the symptoms of burnt out were just that - from overwork. So I'm taking ample time off to reconsider another career choice, or go back to something more manageable. Initially, I fell physically sick immediately once I left (minor illness), and experienced some intense emotional flat-lining for a couple of weeks (the feeling that if I died that would be just fine because I had no energy or desire left - though I wasn't suicidal by any means). It was a horrible feeling to be that depressed, but I also figured it would pass. And it did. As I felt better I moved through deep bouts of sadness... on and off… seemingly out of nowhere... or sensitivity to things that normally wouldn't bother me... or sudden anxiety even when I was just having some fun playing sports or hanging out with friends… some of it was quite frightening and with depth I hadn't felt since I was a teenager… but I didn't panic and instead just went to find a therapist. The therapist suggested it might be PTSD.
Given that I take enormous time for self-care and stillness, while burn-out symptoms include adrenal fatigue as well as depression/anxiety… I don't see it what I have going on as PTSD… but am I wrong? Did the burn-out trigger it? If it's PTSD, in what way? I asked my therapist and they stated that it sounds like my childhood rearing it's head at this time...
I'm feeling better each day, and the symptoms have greatly subsided… they were extreme and intense, but not long lasting... a few hours at a time at most… and I'm already feeling like my normal self again… I'm cautious, but so far, so good. I'm still going to therapy because it helps to have someone listen as I contemplate a career change, and I want to make sure my mental health is on track then given my strong reactions...
Feedback from more experienced folks?