I've read a number of threads where people have posted that their friendships have not survived their PTSD recovery.
Anyway...I have a dear friend who is one of the few people in the world who accepts me for me...no strings, no trying to change me. We've had many conversations about how we've been hurt in the past by people who've walked away rather than accept that we won't fit into their mold, their idea of what we should be.
When my symptoms first started, she was there for me 100%. She even came down to Florida (she lives in Georgia) for a visit and to help me. When I started therapy and meds, she was there and supportive as well.
When the diagnosis of PTSD came back, it was like everything changed. It wasn't too long after my diagnosis that her oldest daughter received the same diagnosis (her daughter had been in an abusive relationship *mental and physical* and her lover had held a butcher knife to her throat and told her 'If I kill you, no one will know'.)
My friend now says things like, 'You go to the doctor they tell you you're either bi-polar or have PTSD. They hand out diagnosis's like their pez candy' and 'Your therapist is wrong...I still say the only reason you're going through what you're going through is because your mom remarried.' When I told her about how bad I had felt this week and my therapist talking to me on the phone and advising me to up me meds for a few days until I can get some stress down, she wrote back in an email that she was hoping that this new therapist and the meds would be working better for me. Like it was his fault that I had a stressful time.
The funny part is that she has fibromyalsia and told me she spent years going from doctor to doctor trying to find out what was wrong with her and there's still a lot of the medical community that believes that FM is 'all in your head'.
My question is do I tell her that when she says things like this, that it hurts more than she can possibly know? Do I just act like everything's fine (we can talk about symptoms and pain and such) but I have to avoid the 'P' word or she goes off.
I don't want to lose my friend whom I love very much. But it's ripping my guts out trying to act like everything's fine.
Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated because I'm pretty stumped. :frown:
Anyway...I have a dear friend who is one of the few people in the world who accepts me for me...no strings, no trying to change me. We've had many conversations about how we've been hurt in the past by people who've walked away rather than accept that we won't fit into their mold, their idea of what we should be.
When my symptoms first started, she was there for me 100%. She even came down to Florida (she lives in Georgia) for a visit and to help me. When I started therapy and meds, she was there and supportive as well.
When the diagnosis of PTSD came back, it was like everything changed. It wasn't too long after my diagnosis that her oldest daughter received the same diagnosis (her daughter had been in an abusive relationship *mental and physical* and her lover had held a butcher knife to her throat and told her 'If I kill you, no one will know'.)
My friend now says things like, 'You go to the doctor they tell you you're either bi-polar or have PTSD. They hand out diagnosis's like their pez candy' and 'Your therapist is wrong...I still say the only reason you're going through what you're going through is because your mom remarried.' When I told her about how bad I had felt this week and my therapist talking to me on the phone and advising me to up me meds for a few days until I can get some stress down, she wrote back in an email that she was hoping that this new therapist and the meds would be working better for me. Like it was his fault that I had a stressful time.
The funny part is that she has fibromyalsia and told me she spent years going from doctor to doctor trying to find out what was wrong with her and there's still a lot of the medical community that believes that FM is 'all in your head'.
My question is do I tell her that when she says things like this, that it hurts more than she can possibly know? Do I just act like everything's fine (we can talk about symptoms and pain and such) but I have to avoid the 'P' word or she goes off.
I don't want to lose my friend whom I love very much. But it's ripping my guts out trying to act like everything's fine.
Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated because I'm pretty stumped. :frown: