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Repressed Emotions, Can't Even Write

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If you met me, you'd see me as talkative, kind of a witty smartass and sort of a know it all depending on what we're talking about.

But a lot of this tends to be a face. I like being talkative and such, but Yeah my emotions just don't show. Not quite a cronic btch face thing, just not showing my emotions. Even when I want to break down half the time, I cant, even in front of my wife.

It's gotten so far as I can't even write music like I used to, and it's not even writers block. I have the words and melody in my head, but can seldom pick up a pen to write it down. It's like I'm locked and loaded but can't fire. It's like cold feet, but with a pen and paper.

Anyone else deal with this? And what do you do about it?
 
Art evokes emotion.

So, cha. Major disconnect with myself there / when my emotions are shut off I'm not really able to make any kind of art. Except? I think one of the reasons art therapy works is that it exists somewhere in the space between, and helps to bridge the gap.

Normal writers block, etc., has an easy cure; Just Do It. I haven't found that to be the case when it's far more of a defensive/protective thing blocking me. As you say, the substance is there, the action isn't. No matter how much I might want to, it's rather like I might very much want to go to a party & have a blast, but my hypervig and anxiety have other ideas. In this case, I'm holding on by my fingertips, and any added emotion or expression of emotion? Is just a very bad idea.
 
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